


right at my fingertips

by icaruspoes



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Diabetic Character, F/F, F/M, M/M, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Social Media, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-31
Updated: 2016-07-22
Packaged: 2018-04-02 05:44:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4048432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icaruspoes/pseuds/icaruspoes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>Hey, this is Steve, the head of Queer Cuties! Thank you so much for your interest in our club. We’ve just decided on the time and place for our first meeting.</em>
  <br/>
  <strong>um what the fuck</strong>
  <br/>
  <em>shit do i have the wrong number? this is Bucky, right?</em>
  <br/>
  <strong>how tf do u know my name omfg</strong>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, everyone! First off, I'd like to thank you for checking out our little project here. It's going to be a bit different from the normal fanfiction you might find. Here's why:
> 
> This story is not based entirely on the prose written; incorporated throughout will be screenshots of various social media interactions between the characters. And just to add another layer of awesomeness, we figured we should actually make these accounts! All things essential to the fic will be included here, but for behind the scenes exclusives, you can follow the accounts! It might not be anything super exciting, just a little extra insight into these characters. Possibly even some foreshadowing to future events in the fic (never spoilers though, don't worry!). The notes at the end of each chapter will include usernames for each character and the social media platforms they appear on.
> 
> We're very excited to get this project off the ground. It's very unique, and we're on the edge of our seats to see how it's received. Depending on your reactions, we may increase or decrease the amount of extra media included. So let us know what you think!!
> 
> Finally, I'd just like to thank the most amazing writing team I could have ever asked for. Some I've been friends with for some time, others I got to know specifically through the process of writing this fic. I'm just so thankful for everyone's input and help. This never would have happened without them. So thank you to Britta, Bethany, and Cass! You're all amazing, and I love you. <3 (:
> 
> A major component of this story is texts between characters. As a way to make the fic look cleaner, each character's texts will be formatting differently. Here's a little key to help you out.
> 
>  
> 
> _steve - italics_  
>  **bucky - bold**
> 
>  
> 
> Warning: There is use of the 'q' slur, but it's not used as a slur. It's used as an umbrella term for LGBTQ+ people. This is an issue that will be brought up later in the story. Just wanted to let you all know. (:

 

\---

Steve sat behind the table, scrolling through his twitter feed as people walked past. Sam smiled at each of them, receiving varied reactions in return. Some people smiled awkwardly and sped up, other glared openly and scoffed as they turned the other way. Sam rolled his eyes and leaned back in his chair when people across the quad stared aghast at the sign above their table.

“Hey Steve, you think we could have picked a more controversial name for our club?”

Steve grinned and looked at his friend, “Are you not queer? Are you not cute? Do you not belong in the Queer Cuties? Because I can easily find others to replace you who might not complain so much.”

Sam sighed, having heard this speech a million times. “It’s about image, Steve. People see this sign and they flee. They’re scared of the word.”

“Oh, would you shut up with your sociology crap? We’re not changing it.” He reached for his water bottle and downed what was left of it. “Want anything? I’m gonna go grab another water,” he stood, sliding his phone into his back pocket.

“Yeah, a diet coke.”

“Those are gonna fuckin’ kill you.”

“Good. That’s how I wanna go. Death by soda. It’s the dream, really.” Steve rolled his eyes as he walked away, tossing his bottle in the nearest recycling bin.

“Boo!” Someone slapped their hands onto both of Sam’s shoulders. He startled, turning around to find Peggy standing behind him smirking. “Hello, handsome,” she fell into Steve’s chair gracefully, putting her feet up on the table.

Sam moved the papers that were near her feet to the other side of the table, “Do you have any manners at all?” Peggy just grinned and poked his bicep with her toe. “Steve’s gonna throw a bitch fit when he gets back and finds you in his seat, you know.”

She shrugged and pulled a granola bar out of her purse, “He can sit in my lap. He’s very comfortable there,” she said with a grin. Sam felt no need to grace it with a reply, so he just grabbed the sign up list and looked over it. “We get any newbies today?”

Sam nodded, “A few. We’d get more if Steve would change the goddamn name.”

Peggy laughed and shook her head, “Have you ever known Steve Rogers to change anything?” Sam snorted in agreement and set the list back down. Someone called to Peggy from behind her. She turned and waved whoever it was over.

“Hey Peg,” a tiny redhead soon appeared, grabbing the snack from Peggy’s fingers. She smirked as she took a bite, looking smug as Peggy snatched it back. “How goes it?”

Peggy glared as she finished off the bar and tossed the wrapper back at her. “Swell. Nat, this is Sam. Sam, this is Natasha, my irritating roommate.”

Nat smiled at him, “I’m not irritating. Peggy’s just mad that I’m better than her at Mario Kart.”

“That’s not true!”

“Nice to meet you regardless,” Sam grinned.

“You too,” she stepped back to look at the sign. “Queer Cuties, huh?” Sam’s head fell to the table as Peggy laughed. “Where do I sign up?” Peggy pointed to the paper with her toe. “Wow, you guys are shit at recruiting,” she said as she began filling out her info. “I’m gonna add some of my friends so this looks less sad.”

Peggy slid her legs off the table and stood, “Okay, I have class. Tell Steve hello for me. I’ll see you later.” She waved and was off.

Nat finished filling out the info and set the pen down, “First meeting set yet?”

Sam shook his head, “Not yet. Steve, the genius behind the operation, will send out texts when we finally decide when and where.”

“Cool, see you later then,” she said and walked away.

Not a minute later, Steve returned with their drinks, “Had to go to five fuckin’ machines to find your death juice; you better have gotten some people to sign up.”

Sam grinned and slid the sign up sheet towards him, “See for yourself.”

Steve glanced over the names, a small smile growing on his face, “Nice job. Guess you’re not as useless as you seem.” Sam decided it was better to not mention that Peggy was the reason for the sign ups. He would much rather take the credit that deal with a grumpy Steve Rogers for the rest of the day.

“How much longer we gotta wait out here for?” Steve pushed back his sleeve to check his watch.

He shrugged, “‘Nother ten minutes? See if we can catch a few last queers.” Sam looked thoroughly unimpressed, while Steve played innocent, “I mean peers.”

“No, you don’t.”

\---

_Hey, this is Steve, the head of Queer Cuties! Thank you so much for your interest in our club. We’ve just decided on the time and place for our first meeting. Since there shouldn’t be too many of us, we’re just going to have a little get together in my dorm. Briarwind Hall, 3rd floor, room 4 at 6 pm on Wednesday night. Let me know if you can make it. Hope to see you soon!_

**um what the fuck**

_shit do i have the wrong number? this is Bucky, right?_

**how tf do u know my name omfg**

_you signed up for my club..._

**srry i have no idea what ur talkin abt**

_I’m so confused._

**same tbh**

_okay uh i guess sorry for bothering you then…_

**np**

\---

\---

Bucky slid his phone into his pocket as he stood to go to the kitchen. Lucky brushed past him on the stairs, wagging his tail happily when Bucky reached out to scratch behind his ears. Grinning, he let Lucky follow him into the kitchen for a treat. He tossed it into the living room then opened the fridge to grab a drink.

“Hey!” Bucky turned to see Clint locking the front door behind him and Nat, “Stop making my dog fat.”

Bucky shrugged, “Too late. You’re the one that feeds him pizza all the time,” Bucky flopped onto the couch, setting his feet on the coffee table, “At least I give him food meant for dogs.”

Nat leaned down to give Lucky a good back scratch as she replied, “He’s got a point.” Clint grumbled about “my dog, my rules” as he grabbed drinks for himself and Natasha. Bucky grinned and shared a knowing glance with Natasha. She rolled her eyes in reply, standing and moving to fold herself into the armchair in the corner. “What did you do today?” She thanked Clint as he passed, handing her a bottled water.

Clint collapsed on the couch next to Bucky, resting his head on Bucky’s right shoulder. Bucky shrugged him off, “Not much. Finished my reading.” Clint glared at his friend but sat up anyway. “Oh, and I got this weird text from someone named Steve thinking I joined his club.”

“Oh fuck,” Natasha sat up, “That’s my bad. I signed you up and forgot to tell you. Oops.” She took a sip of her drink and shrugged. “It seems pretty cool. My roommate’s in it, and she’s cool. The guy at the sign up booth was pretty cute too,” she smirked at Bucky, raising an eyebrow.

Bucky groaned, “I don’t need you setting me up on dates, Nat.”

“Yes, you do. No one’s gonna talk to a surly grump that looks like a hermit on their own.”

“You didn’t need to use both surly and grump. They’re basically synonyms.”

“That’s the part you chose to comment on?” Glaring at Nat never seemed to make him feel any better. This time wasn’t any different. She just stared back at him, daring her to say she was wrong.

He sighed, “Fine.”

She smiled and reached over to pat his leg, “Good boy.”

\---

**ok i figured out how u got my # lmao**

_well I already told you I got it from my club sign up list_

**wow ok lemme have this will u**

**my friend nat signed me up and forgot to tell me**

**shes dumb**

_lol_

**i catch u @ a bad time or smthg?**

_no sorry I just have no idea what to say_

**“wow bucky thats so interesting tell me more”**

_wow, Bucky, that’s so interesting, tell me more_

**u rly felt the need to add commas omg**

_sue me_

**thats adorable**

_excuse you I am not adorable I am Punk Rock_

**cute lil muffin**

_fuck off_

**awww is the lil baby getting angwy**

_I hate you_

**its ok lil buddy dont cry**

_You’re the worst_

**¯\\_(** **ツ** **)_/** **¯**

_oh my god_

\---

\---

_so this is probably stupid, I know you didn’t technically sign up, but are you coming to the club meeting?_

**nah bro i cant i have to work**

_oh okay_

**u disappointed? ((;**

_oh my God_

**thats a yes**

_leave me alone_

**im putting a heart emoji in ur contact name**

_make it the blue one_

**done**

_where do you work?_

_if you don’t mind me asking_

**oh god u cant laugh**

_um okay?_

**im a yoga instructor**

_OMFG_

**i said u cant laugh!!!!!!**

_too late. That’s amazing_

**im deleting the heart emoji :(**

_no no I’m sorry don’t do that_

**its officially the broken heart emoji**

_how can I make it up to you?_

**by not bein a punk for one**

_sorry, that’s in my blood_

**wow**

**tbh i should have seen that coming**

_yeah, you should have_

**have u ever even done yoga**

_I’m punk rock._

**that dont mean u cant do yoga**

**it cleanses ur soul**

_yoga isn’t punk rock_

**having a healthy body and mind is totally punk rock**

_yeah well I’m never going to have either of those so_

**?????**

_nothing. Nevermind_

**u sure?**

**ok**

**i put the blue heart back if that makes u feel better**

_I’m fine, really_

**i can tell when someones upset man**

**do u want any other emojis in ur name**

_the crown and the American flag_

**lmao ok**

**wait hold up**

**is that some kind of capitalist propaganda r u ceo of a corporation or smthg**

_HAHAHAHA_

_no but it’s good to know you hate capitalism_

**well i mean i dont hate it**

**it just hasnt rly worked out for me in the past**

_I totally understand_

_socialism ftw_

**do ppl still use ftw omg**

_will you shut up_

**nah**

\---

\---

“Okay, that’s just not fair,” Peggy said with a grimace.

Having played the “A bigger, blacker dick” card for “A romantic, candlelit dinner would be incomplete without ____,” Sam grinned proudly at his win.

Riley was recovering from his fit of giggles, wiping tears from his eyes. “He knows what I like, what can I say?” Sam sent a wink in Peggy’s direction. She groaned in reply.

Steve, watching in amusement, stood from the couch, “I’m gonna order pizza. Cheese and Hawaiian good for everyone?”

“How about a meat lovers?” Riley grinned suggestively. Steve flipped him off while Peggy punched him in the arm. “Ow! Okay, sorry! Sorry!” He pouted as he rubbed the spot. Sam leaned over and pressed a kiss to it. Peggy gagged and began throwing things.

Sometimes, Steve honestly regretted becoming friends with these people. He walked into the other room to order food, leaning against the wall. As the phone rang, his mind wandered to his text conversations with Bucky. He couldn’t help smiling as he remembered the easy flow of conversation between them the past few days. Bucky’s blatant flirting was something he’d never really experienced before, so he wasn’t sure how to deal with it. He was handling it the best he knew how, which was mostly just saying “oh my god” and blushing a lot. They had never even met, and he got along better with him than the majority of people he interacted with on a daily basis. He should really thank his friend, Nat as he’d called them, for putting Bucky’s number on the list.

Someone finally answered, and he placed the order before returning to his friends. He really should have been surprised by what he walked in on. Peggy stretched across the couch, phone held just above her face. That was nothing new; Peggy was pretty well known for her constant selfies. Sam and Riley, however, were wound together so tightly, it looked uncomfortable.

After pining for about a million years, they had finally gotten over themselves and begun dating. Only a few weeks into the relationship, they were still in the phase where every second they could manage was spent making out. Sam’s fingers were practically knotted in Riley’s short black hair. Riley laughed into the kiss, pulling back to nudge their noses together. Sam smiled and leaned against the back of the recliner to smooth his hand down Riley’s chest.

“If I weren’t so happy that I don’t have to listen to Sam’s whining anymore, I’d throw up. You’re both sickening,” Steve settled himself on the floor between the coffee table and couch. “Are we still playing?”

From Sam’s lap, Riley said, “I don’t think so. You won, anyway. No one’s gonna catch up.”

Steve grinned, “Oh, come on. I haven’t even played anything remotely offensive this game. Just a few more rounds.”

“One more round. Then we watch Netflix. Final offer.”

“Deal. Peggy’s Card Czar.”

Sitting up, Peggy reached for the black deck and read out, “Blank is a slippery slope that leads to blank.” She set the card on the table and checked her phone while the others played two cards each. They all laid the cards face down but clearly paired in front of her. She reached for each set and read in turn, “Crystal meth is a slippery slope that leads to crippling debt. Daddy issues is a slippery slope that leads to graphic violence, adult language, and some sexual content. And finally, fingering is a slippery slope that leads to anal beads. Last one wins.”

“Yes!” Steve pumped his fist into the air and grabbed the black card. Riley suddenly fell off the side of the recliner. Though, whether that was because of his laughter or because Sam pushed him off, Steve didn’t know.

“I believe we have a clear winner. How many cards do you have, Rogers?”

Smiling, he laid them all out of the coffee table, “Uh, looks like,” he paused and tapped each, counting under his breath, “Twelve.”

“I literally only have two. How do you do that?” Peggy complained, slumping back into the cushions.

Steve sat up onto his knees and began cleaning up the cards, “Guess I’ve just got a talent for it.” He crammed all the cards back into the respective boxes and stood to put them in a cabinet. The doorbell rang as he walked back, “Whose turn is it to pay?”

“Riley,” Sam and Peggy said in unison.

He frowned from his spot on the floor. “Why do I feel like it’s not actually my turn?”

“Why do you try to get out of paying every time?” He glared at Peggy, frown still pulling the corners of his lips down. “Oh come on, like it’s not true.”

“I mean, yeah, but damn,” he pulled himself up and went to the door.

Steve sat back on the couch, curling his legs beneath him and reaching for the remote, “Parks and Rec?” They both agreed, so he played the episode they had last left off on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!! Updates should (hopefully) be pretty regular. Stay tuned!!
> 
> If anyone's interested, you can find the characters on these social media platforms:  
> Steve - [twitter](http://twitter.com/stevegrgrs/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/stevegrgrs/)  
> Bucky - [twitter](http://twitter.com/jbuckybarns/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/jbuckybarns/)  
> Natasha - [twitter](http://twitter.com/nat_widow7xX/)  
> Clint - [twitter](http://twitter.com/bendy_barton/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/bendybarton/)  
> Peggy - [twitter](http://twitter.com/peggycarter007/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/peggycarter007/)  
> Angie - [twitter](http://twitter.com/broadwayangie/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/broadway_angie/)  
> Sam - [twitter](http://twitter.com/falcon__punch/)  
> Riley - [twitter](http://twitter.com/okrileyok/)
> 
> Follow me on [tumblr](http://queerbucks.tumblr.com/)!!
> 
> Please point out any errors or weird formatting in the comments! Thanks for reading!!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **steve r we getting married**   
>  _if we are I really need to pick my best man_   
>  **can my best man be a girl**   
>  **bc nat wont be happy if i pick clint over her**   
>  _sure idc_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, first off, I am SO SORRY this took so long to post. I honestly don't really have an excuse. I just got really lazy. Oops. K anyways...
> 
> HAPPY BIRTHDAY, STEVIE!!! This chapter is obviously dedicated to our lord and savior, Steven Grant Rogers. Our precious lil gramps turns 97 today, according to MCU canon anyway.
> 
> Um, alright. I don't know what else to say. Here's the chapter!! I'll try to update sooner next time. :)))
> 
>  
> 
> _steve - italics_  
>  **bucky - bold**

\---

**good morning sunshine!!**

**steve wake up!**

**steve**

**up n at em**

_why_

**its almost 8 am how r u not awake already**

_bc it’s only 8 am that’s fuckin why_

**but steve !!!!!!!!!!!**

**the day has begun**

**so u must rise and live life**

_please never speak to me again_

**somebodys grumpy**

**did the lil baby not sleep well**

_I was sleeping just fine until the devil himself decided to text me before 11 in the goddamn morning_

**ok so heres where id get all Adult and use ur full name if i knew it**

**which i do not**

**so im going to make one up**

**Stefon Elizabeth Reynolds**

**wake the fuck up**

_I hate you_

_I hope you die_

_slowly_

_and painfully_

**thats the spirit!**

**r u getting up**

_no_

**im just gonna keep texting u until u get up**

**perhaps i will sing a song**

**do u have any requests**

_yes_

**omg really**

_I request that you leave me alone_

**well thats just plain rude**

**ah yes**

**the Perfect song**

**r u ready**

_no_

**good !**

**here we go**

**we’re no strangers to love**

**you know the rules and so do i**

**a full commitments what im thinkin of**

**you wouldnt get this from any other guy**

_oh my god_

**i just wanna tell u how im feelin**

_oh ym god find_

**gotta make u understand**

_I’m awake!!_

_please stop_

**that was way faster than i was expecting**

**u didnt even let me get to the chorus**

_why on earth are you awake at this hour_

**????????**

**ive been awake since like 5 am**

_WHY_

**thats when i get up every day??**

_I repeat: WHY_

**ur gonna make fun of me**

_probably_

**my yoga class starts at 6:15**

**so i have to be showered n shit before then**

**and my hair takes a long time to dry**

**and it Must be dry before i put it in a bun**

**or itll be all kinky**

**and not in the good way**

**hello?**

**did u fall back asleep**

**ur hopeless punk**

\---

\---

_I can’t believe you fucking rick rolled me at 8 am_

**i cant believe u fuckin slept until 1 in the afternoon**

_I’m sorry I prioritise sleep over yoga??_

**as u should be**

**do u know how many things i have gotten done since uve been sleeping**

**so much**

_congratulations_

_I had a dream that I was tall and muscley_

_who’s the real winner here?_

**um**

**me bc i dont have to dream to be tall and muscley**

**bc i am that every day**

_are you fucking kidding me_

**omg dude how tall r u**

_oh god_

_please no_

_anything but this_

**cmon tell me!!**

**ill rick roll u again**

_I’m 5’4”_

**UR A LIL HOBBIT OMG**

_I regret this immediately_

**please tell me uve dressed up as frodo for halloween**

_it was one time_

**OMFG**

**REALLY**

**DO U HAVE PICTURES**

**I NEED TO SEE THIS**

_I’m never talking to you again_

**so there are pictures.**

_That’s not what I said_

_I said I never want to speak you ever again_

_for as long as I live_

**until death do us part?**

**steve r we getting married**

_if we are I really need to pick my best man_

**can my best man be a girl**

**bc nat wont be happy if i pick clint over her**

_sure idc_

**my sister is going to be so mad that i havent told her im engaged**

_you have a sister??_

_that would have been a nice thing to know before we got engaged, Buck_

**2 actually**

_what are their names?_

**well i call them becca and booger but their actual names are rebecca and alice**

**btw i added**

**the engagement ring to ur contact name so its official**

_Booger? why would you call your sister booger?_

**bc she picks her nose obviously**

_it must run in the family_

**that is so rude how dare you**

**i mean ur totally right**

**but cmon**

_how old are they??_

**becca’s 17 and booger’s 8**

**she was an accident**

_well yeah with an age gap like that I kinda guessed_

**we r very glad she did happen tho she keeps us in line**

_she’s only 8_

**if u ever meet her i want u to look back on this conversation**

**bc u will laugh**

**she is a powerhouse lemme tell ya**

_ok I just now realized that I asked about Booger, but never about Bucky_

_where did that one come from??_

**my middle name is Buchanan**

**and i dont like my first name**

**thats basically the whole story**

_well what’s your first name?_

**james**

**ew**

_I can kinda see why you don’t like it_

_it doesn’t really fit you_

**yes, exactly!!**

**so bucky it is**

**ok u got my first and middle name whats urs**

**i dont wanna keep using Stefon Elizabeth**

**we can save that for our first child**

_Steven Grant_

**thats so.**

**im gonna stick with stefon elizabeth**

_Bucky, you’re named after a president_

**hey it’s not my fault my parents are nerds!!**

**they named my sisters after historical figures too**

_really? that’s actually kinda cool_

_I was just named after some old relative_

_he was apparently in the Revolutionary War??_

**hey well at least u got some connection. my sister’s named after pocahontas. we’re not native american**

_Pocahontas??? you said their names were Rebecca and Alice_

**when pocahontas married john rolfe and moved to europe, she was renamed rebecca**

_oh, that makes sense_

**also her middle name is pocahontas bc they wanted to make extra sure everyone knew they were nerds**

_who’s Alice named after?_

**alice paul**

_I don’t know who that is_

**u need to take a womens studies class**

_yeah I probably should. can you tell me who she is anyway?_

**she was a suffragist and one of the leaders in getting the 19th amendment added to the constitution**

_oh awesome_

**ok enough about my family. do u have any siblings??**

_nope. only child_

**so ur a spoiled rotten brat**

_I fucking wish. my dad died when I was young so my mom had to support both of us on her own_

**oh fuck im so sorry**

_it’s okay. he was a piece of shit anyway_

**oh**

**i have no idea what else to say**

_haha that’s okay_

_I’ve had pretty much my whole life to deal with it so I kinda just brush it off now. it’s no big deal_

**well it’s good that you’ve come to terms with it**

_yeah_

_so you said you got a lot done while I was sleeping_

_what did you get done?_

**im glad u asked steve (:**

_oh no_

_I take it back_

**hey its nothing bad**

**theres just a Lot**

**i mean i had fucking five hours**

_alright I get it. I sleep too much. let’s move past it_

**i managed to get all these done in the time u slept:**

**1\. bake cupcakes**

**2\. finish 2 papers**

**3\. clean my entire apartment**

**4\. make and eat lunch**

**5\. finish the final season of parks and rec**

**6\. deal with ur sorry ass**

**7\. achieve world peace**

_all I got from this was that you watch parks and rec_

_who’s your favorite character?_

**thats an awful question they are all wonderful and i love them all equally**

**but definitely jean-ralphio**

**urs?**

_I can definitely see that. it’s like a tie between ben leslie and craig for me_

**OH MAN I LOVE CRAIG**

_he’s awesome_

**so i just asked my friend clint what character im most like and do u know what he said**

_no?_

**sewage joe**

**hes no longer my friend**

_OMG THAT’S GREAT_

_give him a high five for me_

**that is so rude oh my god im never speaking to u ever again**

_oh no. tragic._

**goodbye**

_(;_

\---

\---

“Get out,” Angie said immediately.

Nat snorted as Clint said, “Is that any way to treat a paying customer?”

“So you’re actually gonna pay this time?” Angie slid into the booth next to Bucky and kissed his cheek. He grinned in reply and bumped his shoulder against hers.

“That was one time, and you said it was okay!”

“Chill, Clint. Just don’t order one of everything on the menu, or I will throw you out.”

“Someone’s not getting a tip.”

“Ooh, here’s a tip: be nice to customer service workers.”

“Can I order my food now?”

“What would you like, sweetums?”

Bucky rolled his eyes, “For you to stop using those ridiculous pet names. And a cheeseburger, no lettuce or pickles, and a chocolate milkshake.”

Angie scribbled the order on her pad, “You’re the one that made the bet. This is your fault, pumpkin. What do you two want?”

“Just an order of fries and diet coke,” Nat said, pouring salt and pepper onto her napkin to make shapes.

“Okay, are you ready?” Clint closed his menu with a snap, “Two orders of mozzarella sticks, a basket of chicken tenders, fries, and a strawberry lemonade.”

“Okay, I’ll go put your order in, then clock out so I can eat with you guys,” she stood and walked away.

Grinning, Nat slid the napkin around to show Clint and Bucky her masterpiece, “Do you like it?”

“What the fuck is with you and that frog?”

“His name is Pepe.”

“I’m discontinuing this friendship.”

“No, you aren’t. You wouldn’t get any dates without me.” Bucky just flipped her off and leaned back, crossing his arms over his chest. “Speaking of dates, I asked Peggy if Sam, her cute friend, was single but he’s taken. She said she has a few other friends she’d be willing to set you up on blind dates with though.”

“Nat, I appreciate that, but do you remember the last time I went on a blind date?”

“Yes, but Peggy’s friends aren’t assholes.”

“Still!”

“You’re going on a date if I have to drive you there myself and sit with you the entire night.”

“How do you expect me to get laid if you’re sitting next to me the entire night?”

“I don’t expect you to get laid. I expect you to meet someone nice and settle down and get a bunch of cats that I will name because you are awful at naming animals.”

“Not as bad as Mr. Pizza Dog over here,” Bucky gestured to Clint.

“His name is Lucky!”

“Yeah, I named him that!” Natasha shouted back.

Angie, now in jeans and a tank top, came back carrying everyone’s food. “Stop fighting. Food’s here.” Clint immediately reached for his mozzarella sticks and shoved two in his mouth. “So what are the plans for tonight?”

Mouth full of burger, Bucky said, “Alcohol, and lots of it.”

Angie nodded approvingly and stole one of Clint’s chicken strips, “Sounds good.”

\---

When they returned to Clint and Bucky’s apartment, they realized that simply sitting on the couch and sharing a bottle of vodka wasn’t fun unless there was a catch. So they came up with a game. While marathoning Parks and Rec, when the following things occurred in the show, they each took a shot:

  *          Andy plays the guitar.
  *          Leslie compliments Ann.
  *          Ron says “no.”
  *          April says/does something dark.
  *          Tom spends too much money.
  *          Donna makes a pop culture reference.
  *          Chris works out.
  *          Ben says something nerdy.



Needless to say, they were not sober for very long.

\---

**hheeyyyy stevvvee**

**sttteve**

**ssstevvvvvvviiiiiiiee**

**stteiviiwe**

**how re yu mnsan**

_um_

_hi?_

**hiiii stteeeviee**

**urs o cuter**

**diud know that ,,?**

_are you drunk?_

**waht**

**mn ooo**

**ok mayybe a luol**

**ur sosi cutie thoio st evuie**

**wirth iur cojmmas snf sdjit**

_I think you might need to go to bed, Bucky_

**nnooi**

**u soiinmd luike natr**

_Natr sounds smart. Listen to them._

_have some water and go to sleep_

**but i wan na talj yo uuuuuuuuuuuuu**

_I’ll talk to you in the morning, Bucky. Go to sleep_

**yurr nop fdun**

_excuse you. I am very fun_

**wees shoud lapy a ggame**

_what game?_

**20 quesjtism!!**

_this cannot end well_

**pleauis stteviioe!!’!**

_fine. you go first_

**re ui s vivrgin?? ((5(;**

_I’m not answering that_

**stecvie’ ! y hacr tp**

_yeah_

_okay next question!!_

**stevvii tjjjat ist soooooooo cuuuuiuuuutre**

_yes well moving on_

_what’s your favorite tv show?_

**keerping upp woyh tjr kjardashionsd!! &'**

_oh my god Bucky are you serious_

**yessss itss veryyh gooi**

**i candt befkirbe iure as vforgin**

**okkm ky ymturn!!**

**waht err u waerinfg!’?**

_I cannot believe I agreed to this game_

_I am wearing sweats_

**nnno shurtf?**

_nope_

**cann juy srned mwe s poic?’**

_and now I am going to bed_

_good night, Bucky_

**stevver?**

**sssttteevevviieive?**

**goopd uight**

\---

**oh my god**

**im so sorry**

**fuck oh my gdo**

**ill never text u again**

**leave me to my humiliation**

**bye**

_Bucky_

_please chill_

**im so sorry**

_stop_

**u hate me dont u**

_no_

**r u sure**

_quite the opposite, actually_

**what**

_you’re quite forward when intoxicated_

**OH GOD OH NO**

**WHAT DID I DO**

_you may have suggested we play 20 questions_

_then immediately asked if I was a virgin_

_and then what I was wearing_

_and if I would send you a picture_

**how are you still speaking to me**

_it was pretty cute_

**i thot u were Punk Rock and didnt like cute shit**

_I’m allowed a few exceptions_

**and im one of them**

_guess so_

**is there like a rule book for being Punk Rock**

**just so i can do some research for myself**

_Punks don’t follow rules_

**omfg**

**hey uh**

**just for the record**

**i think ur rly cute too**

_I know_

_you told me last night, like 30 times_

**oh god**

**im so sorry**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!! I hope you liked it! Please leave comments with your thoughts. I also really like when you guys point out your favorite parts, so please do that!! Thanks!!
> 
> If anyone's interested, you can find the characters on these social media platforms:  
> Steve - [twitter](http://twitter.com/stevegrgrs/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/stevegrgrs/)  
> Bucky - [twitter](http://twitter.com/jbuckybarns/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/jbuckybarns/)  
> Natasha - [twitter](http://twitter.com/nat_widow7xX/)  
> Clint - [twitter](http://twitter.com/bendy_barton/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/bendybarton/)  
> Peggy - [twitter](http://twitter.com/peggycarter007/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/peggycarter007/)  
> Angie - [twitter](http://twitter.com/broadwayangie/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/broadway_angie/)  
> Sam - [twitter](http://twitter.com/falcon__punch/)  
> Riley - [twitter](http://twitter.com/okrileyok/)
> 
> Follow me on [tumblr](http://queerbucks.tumblr.com/)!!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **hey**   
>  **can i ask u a question**   
>  _that sounds ominous_   
>  _but yeah_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I actually finished the chapter in a respectable amount of time!! Amazing!! Okay, I really like this chapter. Which is probably why it took me so much less time to write it. Okay, enough. I hope you enjoy it :)))
> 
>  
> 
> _steve - italics_  
>  **bucky - bold**  
>  clint - underline

“Bucky!” the girl’s voice came out a bit tinny from Bucky’s crappy laptop speakers.

He smiled brightly and waved at the screen, “Hey, Booger! How’s it going?”

She grinned and rested her elbows on the table in front of her, “Pretty good. My softball team won our game last week!” Bucky lifted his hand to the camera for a virtual high-five. She giggled and copied him, tapping the screen. “How’s college? Is Natasha there? Do you like your classes? Are your teachers cool?”

“Slow down there, Booger. It’s good. Natasha’s here, but in the other room with Clint. My classes are okay, just really boring. And my teachers are very cool, yes. I have this one – his name is Fury, which is just the coolest name ever, -- and he wears an eyepatch and has a filthier mouth than Ma.”

She laughed, “That’s not even possible, Bucky.”

“Who the hell are you talkin’ to, Alice?” a voice off screen called. Bucky’s mom came over and leaned over to see, “Well, hi, Jamie!”

“Hey, Ma.”

“How’s school? Are you making new friends? How’s Clint?”

Bucky resituated himself on his bed, pushing the pillow behind his back up a little further, “S’all good, Ma. Semester just started, so not many friend-making opportunities. Clint’s fine; I can call him in here if you wanna say hi.”

“No, no, don’t! He’s with Natasha,” Alice interrupted, shaking her head at the screen. “Let them keep making out or whatever.”

Bucky snorted, “They’re probably just watching TV, Booger.”

“Just tell him and Natasha that I say hello. And remind them that they’re welcome to come home with you on your breaks. I need Natasha to re-dye my hair, anyway.”

“Just go to a stylist, Ma. Why do you need my friend to do your hair?”

“She told me not to trust anyone else with my hair! And honestly, I’d rather not piss that girl off. She’s fuckin’ terrifying.”

“Nice to know you’re scared of my friends.”

“Oh, shut up. Alright, bud, I gotta get back to work. I’ll call you later.”

“Wait!” She leaned back down into frame, “I’m coming home this weekend to do laundry. So if you could not hog the washer like last time, I’d appreciate it.” He smiled and batted his eyelashes innocently.

“We all know you just come home to see us.”

“This time it’s just for laundry.”

His mom narrowed her eyes at him, “Fine, I’ll make sure to let Becca know she can finally move into your room then.”

Bucky held up his hands in defeat, “Alright, alright, you caught me. I’m just coming home to see you. Just trying to keep my street cred.” She snorted and ruffled Alice’s hair before walking away.

Bucky looked into the camera and mouthed, “It’s just for laundry.”

\---

**good afternoon r u awake yet**

_shockingly enough, I’ve been up for about four hours_

**wow!!!! amazing!!!!!**

**im proud of u stevie**

_well I had a doctor’s appointment so it wasn’t like I had a choice_

_believe me, if I did, I’d still be dead to the world_

**drs appt???**

**r u sick whats wrong do u need soup**

_well, I am sick but not like that? just you know. regular check up for my… issues?_

_issues is a good word to describe them_

**oh**

**um. r u ok?**

_yeah, I’m fine._

_it’s stuff I’ve dealt with for a long time, basically my whole life_

**oh**

**i feel like i shouldnt ask bc ur being rly cryptic**

**but like**

**god this sounds awful**

_no no it’s ok_

_I know what you’re trying to ask_

_um okay there’s kind of a lot?_

**ok**

_I have asthma, a heart murmur, anemia, and scoliosis_

_and that’s actually not all of it I just didn’t want to dump every single thing on you_

**fucking shit**

_yeah_

**im really sorry stevie that must suck a lot**

_it’s alright. I mean yeah it does suck but it’s not like I can just forget about it you know_

**hah yeah. i do**

_um ok let’s talk about something else_

_there’s a club meeting tonight are you finally gonna come??_

**r u pining for me stevie?**

_consider yourself uninvited_

**lmfao im just fuckin with u**

**im actually at my parents place for the weekend**

**i havent done my laundry in like. weeks**

**and its free here so**

_oh nice_

_where do your parents live?_

_is that like a ridiculously personal question_

_pretend I didn’t ask_

**lmao no it’s fine**

**they live in brooklyn**

_WHAT_

_THAT’S WHERE I’M FROM_

**NO WAY**

**WHERE IN BROOKLYN**

_bay ridge!!_

**omfg we’re literally like. right next to each other**

**they’re in borough park**

_what the fuck_

**i know??? how weird omg**

_seriously oh my god_

_ok I have to start getting the place ready for the meeting_

_which you’re missing AGAIN_

_so I’ll talk to you later?_

**yeah sure!! and im there in spirit man**

_yeah yeah whatever :P_

**omg please tell me u use that face on a regular basis**

_BYE_

**;)**

\---

Bucky tossed his phone onto the coffee table in front of him before leaning back against the couch. He looked up at the television to see a completely different show than the last time he looked. He frowned and turned to Clint to ask if he changed the channel but stopped before he asked at the look he was receiving. “What?”

Clint was grinning slyly at him, “Nothing.”

Bucky asks again, “ _What_?”

He stood and refilled his coffee mug in the kitchen, fighting a grin the whole time. “Who’re you texting?”

Bucky blinks, confused, “Nobody you’d know.”

He raised his eyebrows as he looked at him over his cup, “Okay, sure. What’s their name?”

Suspicious, he narrowed his eyes but replied slowly, “Steve.” Clint hums in reply and flicks through the channels. “Why?”

The grin finally broke across his face, “No reason.”

“C’mon, asshole. Out with it. Why do you keep looking at me like you know something I don’t?”

He faked offense, putting a hand to his chest, “ _Me_? I would _never_ do something like that.”

“Do you want me to hide all the coffee again?”

Shaking his head, he said, “God, you’re no fun. I’m looking at you like that because it’s so obvious you like this Steve, seeing as you’ve been texting him nonstop for what – days? Weeks? And _whenever_ you do, you can’t stop smiling like a fool, and you’re constantly giggling.”

“I don’t _giggle_.” Clint looked very unimpressed. “Fine. Whatever. So I like a guy. What’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing at all,” he took a sip, “Have you told him?”

“What? _No_. I haven’t even met him—“

He shut his mouth quickly, but Clint just snorted. “Well, if you ever _do_ meet him, it won’t take him long to figure it out. The second you said his name, you turned red as tomato.”

Bucky was suddenly very aware of how warm his face felt, and Clint let out a loud laugh.

\---

\---

hey didn’t you say the guy you’ve been texting’s name is steve??

**yeah???**

**why**

**clint why**

**CLINT**

bc I think I just met him

**WHAT**

he’s kinda short right?? skinny, blond hair

**i mean. like. ive never met him?? or seen his picture?? so maybe???? he is short but**

call him

if he answers the phone I’ll know for sure

**no oh my god whats wrong with you**

why not?

**ive never talked to him on the phone before**

how precious

**fuck off**

**but like. find out if its him**

what do I get in return?

**ill buy u pizza and beer when u get home**

ok detective barton is on the case

**good luck**

**oh my god i just realized**

**u went with nat to that club meeting tonight didnt u**

yes how did you know that???

**steves the head of the club**

**so yeah**

**its him**

**fuck**

this is going to be so much fun

**CLINT WHAT ARE YOU DOING**

nothing at all, my friend

**could u leave**

**like leave that place immediately**

**i dont permit u to be there**

you can’t tell me what to do

**CLINT I AM BEGGING YOU**

**PLEASE LEAVE**

**DONT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT ME**

**AT ALL**

**DONT SPEAK MY NAME**

omg dude chill

**I CANNOT CHILL UNTIL U LEAVE THAT PLACE**

u need a nap, barnes

**im gonna shit on ur pillow**

you’ve done worse

**oh my god**

**i hate u so much**

**i just want u to know that**

noted ;-)

**ugh**

\---

_apparently your roommate is here_

**steve dont listen to anything he says**

**hes a compulsive liar**

**nothing he says is ever true**

**please ignore him hes terrible and evil and just a gross person in general**

_he seems okay actually??_

**oh god**

**just remember**

**everything he says is a lie**

_he says you giggle when we’re texting_

**by e**

_this is gonna be fun_

**THATS WHAT HE SAID**

**DONT CONSPIRE AGAINST ME**

**I HAVENT DONE ANYTHING WRONG**

**WHY AM I BEING TREATED THIS WAY**

**THIS IS WHAT I GET FOR SPENDING TIME WITH MY FAMILY**

_bucky oh my god will you please chill out?????_

**NO**

**WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVE THIS**

**NOTHING**

**AT ALL**

**EVER**

_ok I find that hard to believe_

**yes okay whatever but please**

_please what?_

**idk??? leave??? kick clint out??????? somETHING**

_this is my dorm I can’t leave_

_plus I’m running this_

_speaking of that I should really stop texting you because the festivities are going to start soon_

**did u actually plan things**

**r u gonna play those dumb ice breaker games**

**steve**

**omg why arent u answering**

_… they’re not dumb_

**OMG**

**STEVE**

**STEVIE**

**PRECIOUS LIL BABY**

_what’s so bad about them?? they’re fun_

**oh steve**

_what_

**u r so precious**

_how many times do I have to tell you_

_I’m punk rock_

_I can’t be precious_

**oh but u r**

**so precious**

**just wanna pinch ur cheeks**

**im not gonna specify which ones**

_BUCKY YOU CAN’T JUST SAY STUFF LIKE THAT_

**r u blushing???**

_fuck you_

**precious**

_ok I really have to go_

_I’m going to ask Clint for embarrassing stories_

_have a good day :)_

_tell Booger I say hello :)_

**ur a blusher :’)**

_BYE_

\---

**hey**

**can i ask u a question**

_that sounds ominous_

_but yeah_

**its not im just kinda tipsy**

_I’m not dealing with your drunk ass again bye_

**no no no**

**im just having wine im just like**

**warm and content**

**and my anxiety is not attacking me rn so like**

**im not freaking out while trying to talk to u**

**which is usually what happens**

_I didn’t know you had anxiety_

**hah yeah well**

**i do and it sucks but thats not what i wanted to say**

_okay, go ahead_

**what do u look like?**

_oh_

_um well_

_you know I’m short_

**yes i do :)**

_ok well that and I’m really skinny too and I have blond hair and blue eyes_

_and I wear these big huge glasses that everyone thinks are Hipster but I actually need them to see_

_but um yeah. I’m nothing special_

**you sound perfect**

_Bucky…_

**sorry**

**except im really not??**

**i really like talking to u and im totally gonna regret this later but god ur just so great and u always make me laugh**

**and yeah i get anxious when i talk to u sometimes but its like?? different. like a good anxious not the kind that makes me feel like im gonna throw up just that like**

**i want to know what ur gonna say and how i can reply to it in the best way to make u like me**

_I do like you, Bucky_

**mm**

**thanks stevie**

_of course, Bucky_

**im gonna go. clint wants to watch a movie**

_ok, I’ll talk to you later_

**yeah :)**

\---

\---

Bucky lay in bed, staring at the ceiling for god knows how long. It was one of those nights when he just couldn’t shut his mind off.

He felt stagnant. He wasn’t doing enough. He would never get anywhere in life. He would be constantly stuck in this place, never getting any further. Working a part time job at a yoga studio was the best he was ever going to get. Constantly worrying that he wouldn’t be able to make rent. No real direction. No idea where he was headed, or even where he wanted to be headed.

The thoughts were relentless. Sighing, he sat up and rubbed a hand over his face. He looked around his room helplessly, staring at a textbook, considering reading ahead just for something to do. Knowing he doesn’t have the energy nor the actual desire, he forgoes it to check his phone.

Nothing new. Not even something from Steve. Not that he was hoping.

Tossing the phone to his side, he lay back again and started digging the heel of his palm onto his temple. He knew he really needed to talk to someone. Clint was asleep, so not him. He’d just make stupid jokes to try to lighten the mood anyway. Not that his heart wasn’t in the right place; that’s just not what he needed at the moment.

Natasha would insist they talk it out. It was something she always did whenever he came to her. She knew him well enough to know that he’d just bottle everything up if she didn’t force it out of him. She was right, but again, not what he needed.

Angie would probably be a good choice, but he knew she slept like the dead. It wasn’t even worth trying to call her since he knew she wouldn’t answer.

The only other person he would even consider was Steve. He felt a little weird asking. They hadn’t been talking all that long. He doubted he’d even be awake. It was after one in the morning already.

Deciding to just let it be, he tried to sleep again. Within minutes, he was staring at the ceiling again like it had personally offended him. He groaned and reached for his phone. He’d never know unless he tried.

\---

**hey um r u awake**

**nevermind then**

_no yeah sorry I am_

_what’s up?_

**were u sleeping**

**go back to sleep**

_no I wasn’t. I was sketching and got distracted._

**ok well**

**um**

**do u mind**

**fuck**

**can i call u**

_is everything okay?_

**yeah i just. idk. sort of.**

**not really**

_give me like 5 mins so I don’t wake up Sam_

**ok**

_you can call now_

“Hello?” Steve answered.

“Hi,” Bucky said timidly.

Shoving his keys in his pocket, Steve walked down the hallway a bit to make sure he didn’t wake anyone, “This is a little weird.”

“Haha, yeah, kind of. Sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“So.”

“So.”

“God, I’m sorry. I’ll just hang u--”

“No, Bucky, it’s fine. Really.”

“Okay. Um.”

“Do you wanna talk about it? Or just get your mind off it?”

“Getting my mind off it would be good.”

“Okay. Tell me about your day then. Or just, uh, ask me something. Anything.”

“Uh,” he cleared his throat, taking a moment to think about what to say, “You said you were drawing.”

“Yeah, I was.”

“Was that, like, a spur of the moment thing, or do you draw a lot?”

“I’m actually an art major.”

“Shit, that’s pretty cool.”

“Haha, yeah, I guess.”

“What kinda stuff do you draw?”

“Everything, I guess.”

“Even, like, nudes? Do people pay you to do nudes?”

Steve laughed and leaned back against the wall, “I’ve done them before, yeah. But technically I was the one paying. Life drawing class.”

“How weird was that? Also, were they hot?”

“It was a little weird at first, I guess. But the environment is very professional. Anyone being gross, rude, et cetera is always kicked out of the class. And no, they weren’t hot. They were old. Never had a nude model younger than 60, probably.”

“Hey, who says old people can’t be hot? Some of them keep it tight.”

“None of the ones signing up to model for life drawing. But I mean, they’re beautiful in their own way. I talk to them after the classes sometimes, and they tell me stories about their lives. How they got scars, stuff like that. It’s really interesting, and when you get them as models again, you kinda pay more attention to those stories. It helps, like -- Sorry, I’m rambling.”

“No, no, it’s okay. That’s really cool. You sound like you really love it. Drawing in general, not just old people butts.”

“Yeah, yeah I do. What about you? What’s your major? Not yoga, I hope. Is yoga even a major?”

“Haha, not yoga. I don’t know if it’s a major, actually. Mine’s history.”

“So you know, like, everything that’s ever happened ever?”

“Totally. Ask me about anything.”

“Okay, who were the opposing sides of the Civil War?”

“Iron Man and Captain America.”

“Oh my god -- are you kidding me? Like, are you fucking serious?”

Bucky couldn’t stop himself from laughing, “Sorry, that was just way too easy. Couldn’t resist. You asked a really stupid question, so I gave you a really stupid answer.”

“Hey, some people don’t know that stuff.”

“Pretty sure most history majors do.”

“Hey, I seem to recall you calling your parents nerds for liking history. Hypocritical, much?”

“I never said I wasn’t also a nerd, smartass. Ask me something else.”

“Fine, fine. Uh, ooh! Here’s a good one. Why was Salvador Dali kicked out of art school in Madrid?”

“What the fuck?”

“So you _don’t_ know everything.”

“No, come on. Let me guess, at least.”

“You’re literally never going to get it. And don’t google it either. That’s cheating.”

“Fuck. Okay. Okay. Uhh, did he, like, I don’t know? Sleep with a teacher?”

“That would have just gotten the teacher fired, probably.”

“God, fuck, okay. Um. I don’t know. Tell me.”

“He thought he was his dead brother’s reincarnation, who was also named Salvador, so he set his bedroom on fire.”

“What? No way. That’s not real. That didn’t happen.”

“Yeah, it did.”

“Fuck. Okay, so you know art history. I bet you didn’t know that Achilles was hella fucking gay.”

“Bucky, everyone knows that. Plus, he wasn’t even a real person. He was a demigod that bathed in the Styx, a river that ran through the Underworld. A fictional person in a fictional place.”

“God, you just know everything, don’t you?”

“Yes. I am the all-knowing being. I’m basically God.”

“You’re so modest.”

“I know, aren’t I wonderful?”

Bucky couldn’t seem to stop smiling, “You’re a nerd, that’s what you are.”

“Oh, well look who’s talkin’, jerk.”

“That’s real nice, Steve. Real nice,” he rubbed at his eyes, glancing at his clock, “Fuck, it’s 3 AM.”

“Shit, is it really?”

“Yeah, haha, I should probably go to bed. You too, honestly.”

“Yeah,” he said but didn’t hang up.

“Well, um, goodnight.”

“Hey, Bucky, wait.”

“Yeah?”

“You know, you can call me whenever. Or text me. If, you know, you need to talk.”

“Thanks, Steve. I, uh, I really appreciate it. And you too.”

“Thank you. Goodnight, Bucky.”

“Night, Steve.”

As Bucky lowered the phone, his smile faded into something much softer. He really did feel a lot better, just from talking. Maybe it wasn’t just the talking; who he was talking to probably played a huge part. He lay back on his bed and threw his arm over his eyes with a groan.

\---

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it's not really clear where Bucky is in each scene, so I'll explain here just in case. When he's first texting Steve about where their families live, he's still at his and Clint's apartment. Then when Clint texts him about the party, he's at his parents place. Then he's back at his place when he asks Steve what he looks like.
> 
> Also, the playlist in there is meant to be like what Steve plays at the club meeting, but it's also just songs for you guys to listen to while reading this. I'll update it every once in a while, too. You can follow it on spotify. If I ever get the patience, I'll try to post it on 8tracks, but I hate making fanmixes. So we'll see.
> 
> Alright, thank you for reading!!! I've gotten such great feedback on this fic, and I'm so grateful. I'm just so glad you guys are enjoying this little universe as much as I am. So keep commenting!! I get super happy whenever I get notifications for comments. They literally make my day. So yeah. :)))
> 
> If anyone's interested, you can find the characters on these social media platforms:  
> Steve - [twitter](http://twitter.com/stevegrgrs/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/stevegrgrs/)  
> Bucky - [twitter](http://twitter.com/jbuckybarns/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/jbuckybarns/)  
> Natasha - [twitter](http://twitter.com/nat_widow7xX/)  
> Clint - [twitter](http://twitter.com/bendy_barton/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/bendybarton/)  
> Peggy - [twitter](http://twitter.com/peggycarter007/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/peggycarter007/)  
> Angie - [twitter](http://twitter.com/broadwayangie/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/broadway_angie/)  
> Sam - [twitter](http://twitter.com/falcon__punch/)  
> Riley - [twitter](http://twitter.com/okrileyok/)
> 
> Follow me on [tumblr](http://queerbucks.tumblr.com/)!!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _is that a joke?_   
>  **no but this conversation is**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trash. I belong in the garbage. This took way too long to write. I'm so sorry. I'm gonna just go ahead and post this instead of rambling. It's shorter than normal, but I'll make up for it next chapter.
> 
> _steve - italics_   
>  **bucky - bold**

**hey what r u doing**

_watching tv_

**!!!!!**

**what show**

_bad ink_

_it’s terrible_

_I’m obsessed_

**oh god that show is terrible**

_at least it’s not keeping up with the kardashians_

**U SHUT UR MOUTH**

_you’re such a nerd, Bucky_

**have u ever even watched the show**

_no_

**then u r not allowed to insult it**

_you’re ridiculous_

**AND UR STUPID**

_that is not very nice_

**tough**

_are you pouting??_

**Yes**

_baby_

**yes, baby?**

_oh my god_

**oh man u have no idea how badly i want to see ur blush rn**

_I hate you_

**no u dont :)))**

_shut up_

**ur still blushing arent u?**

_you know I’ve never really considered actual murder_

_but it might be something I’m capable of_

**u could never kill me**

_can you leave me alone??? I’m trying to watch tv_

**omg stevie**

_oh look at that it’s 6 time for dinner ttyl_

**what r u eating**

_pizza_

**im jealous**

_good. leave me alone_

**stevie for as long as i live i will never leave u alone ever again**

_are you gonna stalk me?????_

**i already am**

***x files theme***

_that doesn’t have anything to do with aliens????_

**OR DOES IT**

_if you’re in contact with aliens you legally have to tell me_

**but i am above such earthly things as Laws. i belong in the stars**

_that was the nerdiest thing you’ve ever said_

**but it’s true**

_you probably know all the constellations and like each individual stars name and what it means_

**and your point is ???**

_you’re a nerd_

**takes one to know one :)**

_rude. so what are YOU doing right now?_

_other than bothering me_

**um**

**definitely not listening to fergalicious……………**

_I feel like I should be more surprised_

**like u dont shake ur ass too when this comes on**

_do you?_

**uh**

**no?**

_real believable, buck_

_you should be a super secret assassin/spy_

**id be great at that wouldnt i**

_shake your butt to distract them_

_then kill them_

**that would work**

**my ass is great**

_hahaha_

**:)))**

\---

\---

\---

Steve was freaking out. He didn’t know what brought it on. Okay, yes he did. The thought of Bucky’s ass probably had something to do with his near asthma attack.

After getting really friendly with his inhaler, he decided to assess the situation. He liked Bucky. He liked Bucky _a lot_. He hadn’t felt this way about a person since Peggy, and he hadn’t even met the guy. He also had no experience in romantic relationships other than Peggy.

Not knowing what else to do, he slung the strap of his messenger bag over his shoulder, wrote a note on a blue post-it to let Sam know where he was, and headed over to Peggy’s apartment. She didn’t live far off campus, but it still took a good 15 minutes to walk there. He called her on his way.

“Please tell me you’re home.”

Sounding disgruntled, she said, “I was napping.”

“Order a pizza. I’m gonna be over in like five minutes.”

“Why do you sound so wired? How much coffee have you had?”

“None, well, this morning I had some. But I need to talk to you about something.”

“Last time you said that, we broke up.”

“Peggy, c’mon.”

“Fine,” she sighed, and Steve heard her start moving around, “I’ll leave the door unlocked. Just come on up.”

“Thanks, Peg.”

“Yeah, yeah. You’re paying for the pizza.”

“Deal. See you in a few.”

“Bye.”

\---

Peggy heard the door swing open from her spot on the couch. Steve kicked the door closed behind him, and it slammed harder than he intended. A muffled “sorry!” floated over to her as he rummaged through the cabinets for glasses. She grinned to herself and stood to help him.

“Is it really so serious that you need alcohol right now, immediately?” She stepped into the kitchen to see him already taking a drink from her bottle of whiskey. He lowered it, looking sheepish. “Wow, okay. This is bad. C’mon,” she grabbed the glasses from the counter, put an arm around his shoulders and led him back into the living room.

Steve slumped into the cushions, curling in on himself immediately, “I have a problem.”

As she poured a generous amount into each glass, she said, “You don’t say?” He reached for the glass. Peggy put a hand on his wrist, “Slowly.” He rolled his eyes and took a sip. She cradled her cup in her hands, leaning back onto the arm of the couch, “Spill.”

It took him a moment to form the words. He hadn’t said it aloud yet, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to, either. “Okay,” he paused, “okay.” Peggy was very patient, familiar with Steve’s over-analysis of every single thing he ever did. “So… okay. There’s this guy.” Mid-sip, she nearly spilled her drink down her shirt. She placed the glass on the coffee table and leaned forward to kiss his forehead sloppily.

“Oh my god. Finally. Yes. Tell me everything. Is it someone I know? OH! Is it whoever you’ve been texting nonstop for like weeks? Is he cute? When can I meet him?”

Steve shook his head quickly, “No, no, no. We’re not like… anything. Yet. Fuck, it’s not even like we’ve explicitly told each other anything. We haven’t met in person. We’ve just been texting, and we talked on the phone for the first time the other night. And… I don’t know. Some of the things he says make me think… But I don’t know! I just, God, Peggy. You’re the only other person I’ve felt this way about.” He took a deep breath and looked at her. She was smiling like a maniac. He sighed and took a long drink of whiskey.

“This is good, Steve. Really good.”

“Tell that to the bottomless pit in my stomach.”

“Let me see your phone.”

“Why?”

“Do you want to know if you have an actual chance with him or not?”

“Well, yes, obviously.”

“Then give me your phone.”

He gestured to his bag that he’d dropped on the floor, “You’re not gonna call him, are you?”

She rummaged through it, pulling out uncapped pens, four packs of tissues, and about 14 receipts before finally finding the phone. “I’m just gonna read your conversation. See if you’re being delusional or not.”

Steve groaned and covered his eyes, “Don’t make fun of me.”

She snorted and handed it to him to unlock it, “I’m going to be making fun of you until the day you die.”

“That’s fair,” he replied as he gave it back with the messages open.

“Bucky? Why do I know that name?” Steve shrugged. “Do you know what he looks like?” He shook his head. She shrugged and went back to the messages. “Oh my god, Steve.”

“What?”

“Just… oh my god.”

“Peggy, what?”

“‘I really like talking to you, and I’m totally gonna regret this later but, god, you’re just so great and you always make me laugh.’ Steven Grant Rogers, you are so fucking unbelievably blind.”

“Well, I mean, he said he was drunk…” He sat forward and set his drink on the table.

“So what? Steve, he _likes_ you. A lot. Like, damn. I didn’t even like you this much, and we were in love.”

Steve rolled his eyes and took his phone back from her, “That’s just how he is.”

“Why are you so hell bent on believing he doesn’t like you?”

Steve just stared at her. She stared right back, defiant as all hell. “I-- I don’t know.”

Peggy sighed and took his hands in hers, “Steve, listen to me for a second.” She took a deep breath and made sure he was looking at her. “Do you know why we broke up?”

“You said you wanted to focus on your studies…”

She nodded, “Yeah, well, that wasn’t the whole truth. We broke up because whenever I tried to tell you I loved you, you’d change the subject. And when I did get it out, you wouldn’t believe me. You put me on this pedestal that I had absolutely no right to be on. I felt like I couldn’t make a mistake in case it ruined everything. It was awful. And eventually, it started to overshadow how much I loved you. You are constantly, never-endingly critical of every single thing you do that you convinced yourself you weren’t good enough for me. Which is just ridiculous because the reason I started dating you in the first place was because of how good you were. And you’ve only gotten better.

“I just,” she sighed again and leaned down to kiss his knuckles, “I wish you could see what I see. Like, first of all, you’re fucking sexy as hell. How you don’t spend all day just staring at your reflection is beyond me. With your long eyelashes and your cheekbones and your cute li’l floppy hair.” She reached up to brush his bangs out of his eyes, “And you’re so good. So, so, so good. You never pass up an opportunity to help someone. Even when you aren’t asked to do so. _Especially_ when you’re not asked. Just, god Steve, you’re worth so much more than you give yourself credit for.

She took a deep breath, “So, the point I’m trying to get at, I want you to be happy. And if the smile on your face whenever you’re on your phone is anything to go by, Bucky makes you happy. And I’m pretty damn sure he likes you too. He wouldn’t put up with your bullshit otherwise.”

“Are you done?” Steve grinned, and she laughed and let go to slap his arm.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m done, idiot.”

“You’re not gonna say you wanna get back together? You’re good?”

“I take it all back. You’re a piece of shit.”

Steve laughed and put his arms up for a hug, which she returned happily. “Thank you. Like, really. I am a piece of shit a lot, but I needed that. So thanks.”

“Anytime,” she smiled and kissed his cheek. “So what are you gonna do?”

“What?”

She rolled her eyes, “About Bucky. I didn’t just say all that for nothing.”

Steve smiled and looked at his phone. He took a deep breath, “You really think he likes me?”

“I’m gonna fucking kill you, you self-deprecating prick. Call him before I do it for you.”

\---

_hey are you busy this weekend?_

**is there another club meeting that i will evidently miss even tho i swear i try to go to them**

_no actually I was thinking we could hang out?_

**what**

_uh. hang out. like go to the movies or something?_

**i know what hanging out is**

**just**

**where is this coming from?**

_other than the fact that I doubt we’ll ever meet at a club thing?_

**yeah**

_um_

_well like_

_I was just thinking we could like_

_get dinner. go to a movie. um whatever else we feel like doing_

**steve**

**r u asking me out**

_what no why would you think that??????_

**bc ur being awkward as hell and i can feel ur blush from here**

_ok so. if I was_

_I’M NOT SAYING I AM_

_what would your answer be?_

**real smooth, killer**

**id say yes ofc i want to go on a date with u, u idiot**

_is that a joke?_

**no but this conversation is**

_oh_

**im finally gonna see ur blush in person :-)**

_I take it back I hate you_

**shut up**

**i am free this weekend. specifically saturday after 6 :)**

_ok. okay_

_do you wanna meet somewhere?_

**how about the starbucks around the corner from school?**

_okay. yeah. that works._

**awesome**

_:)_

**:)))**

_:)))))_

**ok stop**

_;)))))))_

_\---_

_ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!! I hope you liked it! Please leave comments with your thoughts. I also really like when you guys point out your favorite parts, so please do that!! Thanks!!
> 
> If anyone's interested, you can find the characters on these social media platforms:  
> Steve - [twitter](http://twitter.com/stevegrgrs/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/stevegrgrs/)  
> Bucky - [twitter](http://twitter.com/jbuckybarns/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/jbuckybarns/)  
> Natasha - [twitter](http://twitter.com/nat_widow7xX/)  
> Clint - [twitter](http://twitter.com/bendy_barton/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/bendybarton/)  
> Peggy - [twitter](http://twitter.com/peggycarter007/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/peggycarter007/)  
> Angie - [twitter](http://twitter.com/broadwayangie/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/broadway_angie/)  
> Sam - [twitter](http://twitter.com/falcon__punch/)  
> Riley - [twitter](http://twitter.com/okrileyok/)
> 
> Follow me on [tumblr](http://queerbucks.tumblr.com/)!!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **ur cute :-)**   
>  _ur lame :-)_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry
> 
>  
> 
> _steve - italics_  
>  **bucky - bold**

**hey guess what!!!!!!!!**

_idk what_

**u have to guess**

_I’m bad at guessing_

_just tell me_

**> :((**

**ur no fun**

**but fine**

_ok it’s been like 5 mins what_

**ur cute :-)**

_ur lame :-)_

**r u doing anything rn**

_no why?_

\---

“Hello?”

“Hey, beautiful.”

“I hate you.”

“How red are your cheeks?”

“I’m theriothly gonna hang up.”

“Are you wearing a retainer or something?”

“Huh?”

“I don’t remember you having a lisp last time we talked.”

“Oh, thit.”

“Did you just call me a tit?”

“No, oh my god. Fuck, okay, don’t laugh at me.”

“I make absolutely no promise of that.”

“Ugh. Okay. I got my tongue pierthed.”

“You…”

“Yeah.”

“Oh my god…”

“Are you laughing?”

“No, oh my god, no. Not at all. Just… shit, Steve.”

“What?”

“Your tongue is pierced.”

“Yeth, it ith.”

“Oh my god. I’m like sitting in the library right now…”

“Tho what?”

“Do you know why most queer guys get their tongue pierced, Steve? I am _picturing things_ , and it is entirely _your fault_.”

“Oh my god! Bucky!”

“ _Your fault!_ ”

“That ith tho not why I did thisth. Oh my god.”

“I have to go, oh my god. Bye.”

\---

_hey, Buck_

**what**

_are you blushing?? ;)))_

**OH MY GOD**

\---

**so. tomorrow.**

_tomorrow._

**um. r u nervous.**

_yes._

**oh thank god i thot it was just me**

_oh god no definitely not_

_I’m freaking out_

**thats. good to hear.**

_like???? what if we dont get along._

**what if u think im hideous**

_lmao you finding me hideous is much more likely_

**um no its not?????? u told me what u looked like**

_that’s a good point. your turn_

**what?????**

_tell me what you look like_

**……………………i dont want to**

_why?_

**ur gonna think its dumb**

_well obviously_

**ur so mean omg im never speaking to u again date is OFF**

_shut up_

**ok so like. i dont like talking about myself**

**and there r weird things**

**that id rather u just figured out in person**

**but like. ok**

**so i have like shoulder length brown hair thats rly fluffy**

**blue eyes. chubby cheeks. tall. muscley (as we have already established)**

**um. idk what else**

_you describe your hair as fluffy?_

**yes bc it is**

_idk if I believe you_

**u’ll see for urself tomorrow**

_oh god_

**same**

**ok well. im going to take a bath. so ill see u tomorrow.**

_you take baths? omg_

**well how else am i going to use my bath bombs!!!!**

_Bucky oh my god_

**oh shut up. u’ll be thanking me tomorrow when i smell like a bouquet of roses**

_sure I will_

**just wait. good night :-)**

_good night :)_

\---

Bucky’s heart rate was picking up. His vision was getting blurry. He leaned against the wall and pressed a hand to his ribcage to keep himself from hyperventilating. “Clint!” He took a deep breath and held it.

“What’s up, homie?” He poked his head in the room, saw Bucky struggling for breath, and immediately came over and pulled him to the bed to sit. “What’s wrong?”

“I can’t,” he took another breath, “figure out,” he lay back and gestured to his closet, “what to wear.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Clint glared. Bucky tried holding his breath again to regulate it, and it seemed to work this time. He threw his arm over his eyes and shook his head.

“I wish I was,” he sat up again, fingers still pressing into his side. “I have a -- thing,” he paused to glance at Clint from the corner of his eye, “to do today. And I need to look nice.”

“So you’re finally meeting Steve, huh?”

“How on earth did you figure that out?”

He shrugged, “I’m brilliant. I can’t solve your problem though. That’s more Nat’s area of expertise.”

“Well, she’s not here. So you have to help me,” he stood and swayed slightly at his head rush. He pulled three pairs of pants from a drawer and laid them on the bed. Then he reached for an entire section of shirts hanging and laid them above the pants. Clint groaned and made pained noises the entire time.

“You’re such a gay stereotype, Bucky. Just pick an outfit.”

“Okay first of all, I’m not gay. I’m pan. Now shut up and tell me which blue makes my eyes sparkle the prettiest.”

Clint sighed and pointed to the shirt furthest to the left.

\---

“Hey Sam?” Steve called, scrutinizing his reflection in the mirror. Sam appeared in the reflection, and Steve met his eyes. “Does this sweater look okay?”

Sam rolled his eyes, “You look fine, man.”

“Fine isn’t good enough.”

“You need to chill.”

“You need to take this seriously!”

“You need a drink!”

“Just tell me if I should wear this one or the red one.”

“I don’t care.”

“I got you and Riley together. You owe me.”

Sam sighed and flopped himself onto his bed. “The red one. It shows off your collarbones.” Steve looked at him with a raised eyebrow. “Hey, you’re asking for a gay man’s opinion; you asked for this.”

“You like my collarbones?”

“I’m never speaking to you again.”

“Are mine better than Riley’s?”

“I’m leaving. I hope Bucky’s hideous and boring and a serial killer,” he waved as he slammed the door behind him.

“Thanks for the support!”

\---

Standing just inside the apartment door about to leave, Bucky freezes, “I can’t do this.” His panic was rising again. What if Steve didn’t find him attractive? What if they had nothing to talk about? What if he stood him up, or worse, came and saw him and left? Sent him a text saying ‘hey sorry u were ugly and i can do better sorry have a nice life’? The one person he’s felt really comfortable with in ages, and he’s going to ruin it. Steve isn’t going to like his personality. He’s not going to like anything about him. Who would?

He was getting dizzy again. His stomach clenched uncomfortably. He could feel the beads of sweat forming on the back of his neck. He leaned against the doorframe for support, but it wasn’t enough. His knees gave out, and he collapsed.

\---

Steve walked into the Starbucks a few minutes before 6 o’clock. He found a small table in the back facing the door so he could keep an eye out for Bucky. He took out his phone and opened and closed apps absently, head snapping up each time the door opened. He checked the time: 6:07. Nothing to worry about yet. They didn’t say they would meet exactly at 6:00 on the dot. Bucky just said that he was free after then. So he was on his way. No reason to be worried he wouldn’t show up.

He glanced around the cafe, wondering if he’d somehow missed him walking in. Nothing. He checked the time again: 6:16. Still completely reasonable. He pulled up their messages anyway, paranoid that he’d read the time wrong. He hadn’t. His fingers hovered over the keyboard for a moment. He sighed and set his phone face down on the table and ran his hands through his hair.

He picked it up again and typed out a message.

_hey I’m here :)_

He considered adding more for a moment, then quickly pressed send before he embarrassed himself further. Everyone was watching him. They knew he’s here for a date. They knew the date has not shown up yet. They knew that it’s because he’s awkward looking and weird and there’s no reason anyone would ever want to date him.

6:24.

No reply.

6:31.

Still nothing.

6:39.

_are you on your way?_

6:47.

_If this is a joke, it’s not funny._

6:53.

_Bucky?_

7:05.

_If you didn’t want to meet up, you should have just said so._

7:17.

_I’m going home._

\---

Steve stomped into his room, slamming the door behind him _hard_. He threw his jacket onto the floor, kicking it across the room. He grabbed a pencil from his desk and broke it in half, tossing the pieces across the room. He pulled his phone out of his pocket, checking for messages once, finding nothing. About to throw it at the wall, he grudgingly reconsidered and pitched it onto his bed. It bounced off the edge, and he dove to catch it. Still incredibly angry and hurt, but not willing to pay for a new phone.

Mostly, he was angry at himself. He should have known this would happen. There was no way a guy like Bucky would ever be interested in him. He didn’t know why he’d gotten his hopes up in the first place. He sank to the floor beside his bed and curled into himself. Arms wrapped around his knees, he tucked his head down and let the sob wrack through him.

\---

Around 9:00, he finally moved from the floor to get some water. The crying had seriously dehydrated him, and a headache was forming. He saw his phone light up with a call from the last person he wanted to speak with at the moment. He took a long drink from a water bottle before answering, “I don’t want to talk to you.”

“Um, Steve?”

“What.”

“Hey, uh, it’s Clint,” the sharp hint of panic in his voice made Steve soften slightly.

“Why are you calling from Bucky’s phone?”

“Well, it’s kind of a long story. One Bucky should probably tell you himself. But, uh, long story short: Bucky’s in the hospital.”

“WHAT?”

“He’s gonna be okay. He’ll be fine just... God, he should really be telling you this.”

“He’s okay? What’s wrong?”

“I’m really sorry, Steve, I can’t tell you. You really need to talk to him. It’s his thing.”

Steve took a few calming breaths, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Okay, yeah. I understand. Uh, thanks. For telling me.”

“Yeah, I figured you might be pretty worried, when he didn’t show for your… thing.”

He scoffed, “Huh, yeah. Worried, pissed. You know, same thing.”

“It’s not his fault, Steve. Really. He really wanted to be there.”

“No, yeah, whatever. Sure he did.” He was starting to get worked up again, “I, um, I have to go. Will you,” he sighed, “will you keep me updated? Just from, uh, from your phone. Text me what’s going on and everything.”

“Yeah. Yeah, of course, man. I’m really sorry.”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

“See you.”

“Bye.”

\---

Steve now lay in his bed, just staring at the ceiling. He was still mad. Still unbelievably pissed. He hated that Clint couldn’t just tell him what was going on. Why? What could have happened that was so personal that Bucky had to tell him himself?

He also felt incredibly guilty. He shouldn’t be mad. Bucky was obviously in a worse predicament than him. He was in the hospital. Steve had been in the hospital plenty enough times to know how awful it is to spend any extended period of time there.

But, of course, Steve had no idea if Bucky was spending an extended period of time there. What if he wasn’t even there at all? What if he asked Clint to say it as an excuse so he didn’t have to explain why he hadn’t shown at Starbucks?

But Clint was a good guy. He wouldn’t do that. Bucky also didn’t seem like the type.

Then again, he didn’t know Clint all that well. They’d only met once. And Bucky, well…

His thoughts cut off as his phone started vibrating next to his head. He immediately picked it up to see who it was. It was Bucky again. He half hoped Clint was actually on the other end, but he’d been texting him from his own phone. So he knew it must have been Bucky.

He took a deep breath and answered the call, “Hello?”

“I’m so sorry. Steve, oh my God, you have no idea how sorry I am. I wanted to meet you so bad. I still do. I would come over to wherever you are right now if I could. Oh my god. I’m so sorry. Fuck, I was so excited. I was so _ready_. God. Fuck. I can’t believe this.”

Steve was starting to tear up but held on, “Yeah, well. Me either.”

“I can’t even imagine how pissed you are. I know how mad I’d be if it had been switched. God, I owe you so bad. I just, god! This had to happen today, of all days.”

“Okay, I gotta know. What happened? Clint was so cryptic. Saying, ‘Oh, he has to tell you. It’s not my place.’ Are you dying? What’s going on?”

“Leave it to Clint to blow everything out of proportion. God, I hate my friends. Okay, so it’s really not that bad. I’m fine. This has happened before. It’s not exactly normal, but like, it is for me? I guess. Sort of.”

“Get on with it.”

“Okay. So um, I’m diabetic. And I uh, I had a hypoglycemic episode. Paired with a pretty gnarly panic attack. Passed out.”

“Oh my god!”

“Clint forgot everything I’ve taught him about dealing with crises. Idiot. Been living with me 3 years and can’t remember how to work a fucking glucagon kit. So he calls the ambulance. So unnecessary because I’M FINE!” Steve was silent for a moment, just trying to process everything. “Sorry. That was to the nurse that just passed by my room. They won’t let me leave.”

“Bucky, oh my god.”

“But I’m good, Steve. I’m fine. I’ve been dealing with this since I was 13. It’s been much, much worse.”

“That doesn’t make me feel any better.”

“Shit, sorry.”

“Just… god. Bucky.”

“I’m okay.”

“Are you sure?”

“Absolutely. Never been better.”

“Well, good. ‘Cause I’m gonna kick your ass when we meet.”

“That’s fair,” the smile was apparent in his voice.

“Okay, well, I’ve been up for like, 20 hours. I should go to sleep. If that’s even possible.”

“Hah, yeah. I get you.”

“I just. Have a question.”

“Shoot.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you were diabetic? I mean, like, I told you all my things. Well, some of my things. But like, I don’t know? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Okay,” he sighed, “this is where Clint kinda did the right thing in not telling you. This is going to sound weird, but I’ll tell you later? Just, it’s a big part of me. There’s a lot of… backstory? That’s not the right word. Whatever. I promise as soon as we meet, I will explain fully. It’ll be so much easier.”

“You’re the most confusing person I’ve never met, Buck.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“Okay, I’ll wait for your full answer, weirdo. Talk to you later?”

“Absolutely. Get some sleep. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Okay. Bye.”

“Goodnight.”

\---

**im so disappointed i didnt get to see ur blush**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yikes wasnt that a ride??? :))) no social media this chapter 30% bc it didnt work with the chapter 70% bc im lazy af
> 
> If anyone's interested, you can find the characters on these social media platforms:  
> Steve - [twitter](http://twitter.com/stevegrgrs/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/stevegrgrs/)  
> Bucky - [twitter](http://twitter.com/jbuckybarns/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/jbuckybarns/)  
> Natasha - [twitter](http://twitter.com/nat_widow7xX/)  
> Clint - [twitter](http://twitter.com/bendy_barton/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/bendybarton/)  
> Peggy - [twitter](http://twitter.com/peggycarter007/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/peggycarter007/)  
> Angie - [twitter](http://twitter.com/broadwayangie/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/broadway_angie/)  
> Sam - [twitter](http://twitter.com/falcon__punch/)  
> Riley - [twitter](http://twitter.com/okrileyok/)
> 
> As always, you can follow me on [tumblr](http://queerbucks.tumblr.com/)!!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **so whatd i miss**
> 
>  
> 
> _what_
> 
> **whatd i miss?**
> 
> _me sleeping?_  
> 
> **Virginia my home sweet home i wanna give u a kiss**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know you guys don't wanna hear my excuses for how STUPID long this took, so I'm not gonna put them here.
> 
> Um, okay. So this chapter got away from me, lemme tell ya. At least two scenes in here were not at all planned and just _happened_. I'm not sorry.
> 
> Note the change of rating. T -> M. :) You're welcome.
> 
> Edit: I tried posting this like 8 times with Nat's video embedded, but it did _not_ want to cooperate. So I just linked it.
> 
> OKAY LET'S DO THIS
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> _steve - italics_  
>  **bucky - bold**

**so whatd i miss**

_what_

**whatd i miss?**

_me sleeping?_

**Virginia my home sweet home i wanna give u a kiss**

_I thought you were from brooklyn_

**ive been in paris meetin lots of different ladies**

**i guess i basically missed the late 80s**

**travelled the wide wide world and came back to this**

_I am going to guess that you’re singing a song and haven’t actually been in Paris_

**right-o, stevie!**

_It’s too early for this shit_

**IT’S 10 AM**

_I am well aware of this._

_please let me sleep_

**i stg stefon**

_THAT TOTALLY REMINDS ME OF SOMETHING OH MY GOD_

**jfc ur never this excited what**

_have you ever heard of John Mulaney???????_

**uh think ive heard the name why**

_look him up on netflix he’s hilarious and also the perfect man_

**but his name isn’t bucky???**

_shut up and watch him_

**we should watch him together!!!!!**

_what? how_

**like. at the same time. and we text each other during it**

_but if we’re texting you’ll miss important jokes_

**then we’ll talk on the phone while watching!!! that’ll be better anyway**

_better how?_

**ill get to hear ur pretty voice obviously**

_i hate you_

**no u dont <3**

_yes I do. ok let’s do it_

**!!!!!!!!!**

_I mean I’m not gonna turn down an opportunity to watch mulaney_

**this is gonna be fun!!! when do u wanna do it?? tonight???**

_yeah that works :)_

**ok tonight at like 8ish???**

_sounds good. im going back to sleep now._

**sweet dreams!! (hopefully they include me)**

_sto_

_p_

**;)**

\---

Steve tried to go back to sleep, but he was too excited about tonight to get his mind to shut up. He groaned as he sat up and threw the blankets off him. Sam, sitting at his desk, looked over at him, confused. “Do you have a doctor’s appointment today? I don’t remember you telling me.”

Steve smiled. “No, no. I just couldn’t sleep anymore.”

Sam looked affronted, “Are you okay?”

“Shut up.” Steve rolled his eyes and stood. He grabbed his toiletries and a towel and headed for the bathroom. He took his time in the shower, not feeling rushed like he usually did to get to his classes on time. His mind wandered to Bucky, as it was wont to do recently.

He was happy they were back to normal, or at least semi-normal. He was still nervous talking to him, not entirely sure how he should be responding. He wondered what it was Bucky couldn’t tell him until they met in person. Why couldn’t he just say it over the phone? Was it really that complicated? He’d said he had diabetes, did it have to do with that? It had to.

He stopped that train of thought before it went too far. This was Bucky’s business. He would tell him when he was ready; he said so. He hadn’t even told Bucky all of his issues. He probably would eventually, but why would he dump all of it on him before they were even dating?

He stopped, mid-shampoo and just stared at the wall for a minute. There he was, admitting that they were on a path to a relationship. He latched onto that, a small smile creeping its way onto his lips. He rinsed his hair out as he thought about what their first actual date might be like. Would they go for coffee again, and just talk? That didn’t seem like the best idea, given what happened last time.

Maybe they would go see a movie. He didn’t know if there was anything even half-decent in the theaters, but then again, maybe they wouldn’t even watch it.

_They would sit in the back row, him on Bucky’s right. He’d move to put the armrest down, but Bucky would stop him, instead putting his arm around Steve’s shoulders._

_In this fantasy, Steve wouldn’t be as cripplingly awkward as he usually was. He’d just lean against him, maybe rest a hand on his knee. He’d pretend to watch the movie, but all he’d be able to focus on is Bucky’s hand brushing up and down his arm. Steve could return the favor by sliding his hand up Bucky’s thigh._

_Maybe he’d go still for a moment, watching the slim fingers drag across his tight jeans. Then he’d lean over to whisper in Steve’s ear. He’s not sure what he’d say, but the next second, there’s a warm hand on his jaw and their lips are pressing together._

_He’d turn in his seat, rest his free hand at the juncture between Bucky’s neck and shoulder and press in further. Bucky’s hand on his arm would move to the small of his back. The one on his face would slide smoothly back until the threads of Steve’s hair were catching between his fingers._

_Steve would part his lips, catch Bucky’s bottom lip between his own for a moment then let go. Bucky would do the same, but use his teeth. He’d roll it between them a few times, pulling away slowly to drag it until it slapped back into place. They’d crash together again. Bucky’s tongue suddenly present, darting in every few moments to flick against his teeth, or to mingle with Steve’s. Maybe he’d even play with his piercing._

_Steve would scoot closer, the hand on Bucky’s thigh rising to press against his chest, to feel like muscles moving through his shirt. He’d rise to his knees, needing to be closer to Bucky. Bucky’s hand would fall from his back to his leg, tracing the outside seam of his jeans with his thumb, his other fingers spread out, squeezing his upper thigh, rising steadily higher._

The image faded rapidly from Steve’s mind as he grunted, one hand braced against the wall as the other worked himself through his orgasm.  Spent, he leaned his forward against the cool tile and let the water rinse the evidence away. After a few moments, just breathing, he stood up again and reached for his soap, pointedly not thinking about he’d just done.

\---

The phone beside Bucky’s head was vibrating something fierce. He groaned and sat up, rubbing at his eyes. He didn’t even look at who was calling before answering with a gruff, “Hello?”

“Hey,” Steve said shyly on the other end of the line.

Bucky’s eyes widened and he looked around for a clock, not wanting to pull his phone from his ear, “What time is it?”

“Uh, 8. That’s what we said, right? Is it a bad time? Do you need to go?”

“No! No. God, no, Steve. It’s all good. I just fell asleep. I thought I set an alarm, but I guess not.” He stretched his back out and grinned when he heard the satisfying _pop_. He switched the phone to his metal hand and ran the other through his hair, shaking out the tangles.

“Do you wanna call me back later?”

“No, it’s fine.” Bucky stifled a yawn, but the cat like noise still escaped. Steve straight up _giggled_ into his ear. “Oh, shut up. You probably slept in until four in the afternoon.”

“No, only one.”

Bucky stood from his bed and started making his way downstairs, muttering, “Jesus,” under his breath along the way. He grabbed a water from the fridge and flopped back onto the couch. “So what are we watching?” He reached for the Wii remote and pulled up Netflix.

Steve was stretched out in his bed, laptop half hanging off his bedside table. “Uh, there’s two we could watch. They’re both like an hour each, so we don’t have to watch both of them.”

“I got an idea.”

“Congratulations!”

“Shut the fuck up, oh my God.”

Steve was laughing. “Sorry, go ahead.”

“So, okay. We watch whichever one you think should come first, and then we save the second one,” Bucky took a deep breath before continuing, “for when we have a real date.”

Steve swallowed, picking at the blanket draped over his legs, “That still happening?”

“I spend one night in the hospital and suddenly my feelings for you go away? That’s not how it works, Stevie.”

The tiniest of gasps escaped Steve’s lips, and he immediately slammed a hand over his mouth. He knew he was blushing before he felt his cheeks heat up. He tried coughing to cover it up, but he knew Bucky wasn’t going to let him get off that easy. His blush deepened as he caught on to the double entendre of his thoughts.

Bucky had gone completely still at the sound. “Are you okay?” he whispered, smile tugging at his lips.

Steve nodded, then realized that Bucky couldn’t see him, and said, “Yeah, yeah, fine. You just, um - nevermind.”

“I what?”

“Nothing! Nevermind! Let’s watch the show!” Steve voice was too high, and he was speaking too fast.

“Oh, no, no, no. Explain yourself, mister.”

Steve scrunched his eyes closed and pinched the bridge of his nose, “Okay. Okay, uh. Okay.”

“Spit it out. I’m not gonna judge you, Stevie.”

“That!”

“Huh?”

“The nickname. Stevie. That. Yeah.”

“What about it?”

“You only use it when you’re, like, overtly flirting. And it, uh, I like it, okay? And you just--I’ve never actually heard you say it. It’s always over text. So I just, yeah.”

“You like it, Stevie?”

Steve groaned and buried his face in his pillow.

Bucky felt sort of light headed all of a sudden and felt a warm shoot through his stomach towards his legs, “Shit, Stevie.”

Steve whined and curled his toes tightly, shaking his head to try to get the thoughts to leave his head. He let out a shaky breath, a sound that caused Bucky to squirm in his seat. He leaned back, trying to relieve the ever-growing press of his jeans.

“You, uh, you like nicknames, then?”

Steve half-laughed into his pillow, “Not like, all of them. Mainly just, um, just that one.”

“Yeah? Anyone else ever call you Stevie?”

This was really happening. Steve couldn’t believe it. “No. No, only you. God, this is so not how I thought tonight was gonna go.”

Bucky was gripping his hard-on through his jeans, not wanting to get too into it in case it wasn’t what Steve wanted. His voice was getting breathier as the conversation went on, each reply softer than the last. “How, uh,” he paused and pressed his thumb harder against himself, “how did you think tonight was gonna go?”

Steve laughed. “I thought we were gonna watch the fuckin’ comedy special, not _this_.”

Bucky couldn’t help it; he said, “What is this, then?”

“Oh, God.” Steve couldn’t stop the soft moan as he slid a hand underneath his waistband and wrapped it around himself. “You --”

“Stevie,” Bucky moaned as he finally unbuttoned his jeans.

Right at that moment, Natasha threw the door open and proclaimed, “I’m eating your leftovers!”

Bucky cursed loudly and fumbled the phone in his hand. “Shit, fuck, fuck, fuck. Shit.”

“Bucky? Everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, fine! Lemme call you back!” He hung up quickly and looked over at Nat.

She was leaning against their kitchen counter, arms folded across her chest, a knowing smirk stretched across her features, “Who was that?”

Bucky groaned and covered his face with his hands, sliding slowly to the floor to wallow in his embarrassment.

\---

[video posted to @nat_widow7 on Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/p/BDMk7aTrx8T/)

\---

Sam rolled his eyes at Peggy as she tripped on her way into the diner.

“I’m good. I’m cool,” she straightened her jacket and went up to the counter to order for them. She tried to sneak a look into the kitchen for a certain waitress. Her eyes flicked back up to the menu when Angie turned in her direction. A small smile tugged at her lips as she walked over to take the order.

“What’ll it be?” She grinned and leaned forward, pen poised.

It took Peggy a second to answer, mesmerized by the curls falling around Angie’s shoulders for a moment. “Oh, uh, right.” She blushed.

Sam and Steve split to find a booth, giving the girls their privacy. Angie’s eyes held a twinkle of mischief as she looked at Peggy, as if she were a challenge. Peggy just grinned like an idiot, completely enamored.

Bucky was sitting in a booth on the other side of the restaurant, laughing at something snarky Nat had just said about someone in the cast of a show she was currently in. His eyes flitted through the diner, landing momentarily on a skinny blonde guy sliding into a large booth. He glanced away then directly back. Nat was trying to get his attention again, but he just stared as the guy adjusted his too-large glasses on his nose.

He rose from the table and rushed out to the back alley and leaned against the wall to catch his breath. He pulled his phone out. His fingers hovered over the keyboard for a moment while he figured out what to say.

\---

**um weird question but**

**did you just walk into the automat diner**

_um. yeah_

\---

Steve’s breath caught in his throat at the message. He stared at his phone for a minute, then looked up and scanned the diner for a tall, muscley guy with fluffy hair.

“You okay, Steve?” Sam asked from the other side of the booth. Steve just nodded and looked at his phone again as it buzzed.

\---

**so am i.**

_I don’t see you anywhere?_

**thats bc i panicked and hauled ass into the alley so u wouldnt see me first**

_that’s unfair come back!!!_

**no no u come here.**

_that is not happening_

**im in the fucking alley outside it is cold get out here so i can fuckin kiss u asshole**

_come inside and talk to me like an actual person first please?_

**but ur face is so kissable and now that ive actually SEEN it im not gonna b able to stop myself**

_You fuckin better stop yourself I am with my roommate_

**please**

_I don’t kiss before a first date :)_

**sure but youll have phone sex with them before even meeting them**

**that makes sense**

_WE DID NOT HAVE PHONE SEX_

**WE WOULD HAVE IF NAT HADNT WALKED IN**

_oh my god is that what happened???_

**what the fuck did u think happened**

_I don’t know you just hung up and didn’t call me back_

**shit**

_yeah._

**i guess i can understand why u want to like. talk to me beforehand**

_well I wasn’t really thinking that_

_back alleys just have very naughty connotations okay_

**im not gonna give u a fuckin blowjob!!!!!**

_well that’s a little disappointing_

**well i mean. not NOW anyway**

_(;_

**im coming inside**

\---

Bucky pulled on the door that he had come out of, but it wouldn’t budge. He looked around and didn’t see a way back to street. He groaned and pulled his phone back out. He held the phone up to his ear as it rang.

“I’m not coming out there, Bucky,” Steve said immediately after answering.

“No, I know. Can you come open the door, though? I’m locked out.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I’m not! Help me!”

“I’m coming. I’m coming,” he said and hung up.

Steve stood from his booth, waving a hand at Sam’s confused expression. He took a few steadying breaths as he walked to the door but didn’t pause before opening it. He knew if he did, he’d stand there all day. Better to just jump in.

“Steve,” Bucky said softly.

“Bucky,” Steve replied, unable to hold back the smile spreading across his face.

Bucky crowded Steve on the step and threw his arms around him, taking in as much as he could as fast as he could. Steve almost stepped back but couldn’t refrain from wrapping his own arms around Bucky’s waist. The top of his head reached just above Bucky’s chin, so his head fit perfectly in the crook of his neck.

“Your glasses really are too big.”

Steve huffed a laugh into his chest. “Your hair really is fluffy.”

“I told you!”

Steve smiled and stepped back, pushing his glasses up, so Bucky could actually come in the building. “You wanna come sit with me and Sam?”

Bucky nodded, hands flexing at his sides so he didn’t reach out for him again. “Yeah, yeah, one sec. Lemme just grab Nat, we’ll be right over.” Steve turned to walk away, and Bucky watched him go.

Steve sat down, not meeting Sam’s eyes, and pretended to be thoroughly interested in his napkin. Sam opened his mouth to say something, but Steve’s eyes and hand snapped up to stop him. “Don’t embarrass me.”

Sam just leaned back, put his arms behind his head and grinned. “Why would I do that?”

Steve glared. “I will draw incredibly realistic penises on your face with my Copic pens while you sleep if you say _anything_ remotely negative about me in any way.”

Sam was about to reply, but Natasha and Bucky showed up at their table before he could get out a word. Natasha slid in next to Sam and Bucky, next to Steve.

Natasha leaned forward on her arms and said, “I heard ‘incredibly realistic penises’ on my way over. What are we talking about, boys?” Sam immediately burst into laughter, and Steve’s head clunked heavily against the table.

“Oh, just Steve’s recurring dream. Didn’t you say the guy had long, brown hair, too?”

Bucky was looking at Steve, grinning. Steve didn’t raise his head, just curled further in on himself.

Nat jumped in with, “Hm, I think there was something about a phone call as well.”

Bucky and Steve looked at her perfectly in sync and shouted, “No!”

Half the people in the diner looked in their direction, including Peggy and Angie, who were still flirting up a storm at the counter. Peggy looked at Steve and noticed his blush glowing on his cheeks. She perked up and mouthed, “Is that him?” Steve gestured at her to stop, but Bucky still caught on and turned towards him.

The blush on his cheeks was spreading to his ears, and Bucky’s eyes lit up. “You’re blushing,” he said, not paying attention to Nat whispering conspiratorially to Sam. He sounded awed.

Steve’s neck suddenly felt warm with Bucky’s eyes so focused on him. “Yeah, well, what do you expect?” He looked up to meet Bucky’s gaze. Bucky’s eyes bore into his, and after a moment, flicked down to his lips. Steve reached up a hand to put on his chest. “Hey, none of that. What did I say?”

“I’m not gonna do anything. I’m just enjoying the view,” he said with a grin. He circled his fingers around Steve’s wrist and gently pulled it away from him, then slid his fingers softly along the palm of his hand until they slotted between Steve’s. “That okay with you?”

Steve swallowed, and the twitch of his Adam’s apple caught Bucky’s eye. “Yeah, that’s alright, I guess.” He didn’t think he would ever stop blushing with Bucky looking at him like that. He also didn’t think he ever wanted Bucky to stop looking at him like that. He didn’t want Bucky to stop rubbing his thumb against his skin. He didn’t want Bucky to stop pressing his ankle to his. He didn’t want Bucky to stop leaning ever so slightly closer to him.

Or was Steve leaning in?

He sat up straight and curled a leg underneath him. He cleared his throat and looked up at the counter, “Where’s our food?”

The rest of the table looked over as well. Sam rolled his eyes. “I don’t think she ordered anything for us.” Bucky snorted.

“I actually think I’m gonna go home and study,” Sam said pointedly to Natasha.

“You’re too soft on them, Sam. Trying to be all subtle.” She stood from the table. “Have fun, boys. But not too much.” She winked, and Sam followed her, waving at them.

Steve almost wished they hadn’t left. Almost. Bucky was looking at him again, his eyes bright.

“Oh!” Steve jumped at the sound and looked up at Bucky, who just had the outburst. “Can I see your tongue piercing?” Steve stuck his tongue out to show off the bar. Bucky’s eyes went wide, and he leaned in to get a closer look. “Does it feel weird?”

Steve closed his mouth and shrugged. “A little bit. It took forever to get used to. I talked like I used to when I had a retainer, but I don’t really even notice it now.”

Bucky sat back up, grinning wide. “It’s so cool.”

Steve rolled his eyes. They were silent for a minute, unsure of what to say. “Do you wanna, maybe, go somewhere?” Steve offered.

Bucky sighed, “Yes, please. How ‘bout a movie?”

Steve immediately went red, thinking back to the other day. “I don’t think there’s any good movies out,” he said to cover himself.

Bucky thought for a moment then nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.” Steve was about to offer that they just walk around and go into shops or something when Bucky said, “I got it!”

“What?”

“I’m not telling.”

“Oh, come on! That’s not fair!”

“Oh, it so is. It totally is. C’mon,” he said as he stood up, practically hopping up and down in his excitement, “You’re gonna love it. I promise. You don’t have any plans later, right? Or homework?”

Steve slid out of the booth slowly, keeping a suspicious eye on Bucky. “No, I’m fine. Why can’t you just tell me what we’re doing?”

“Because that’s not fun! Okay, alright. Let’s do this. Wait,” he paused and threw a hand out to stop Steve in his tracks, “Are your shoes comfortable?”

“What, are we going running?”

“Yes, that’s exactly it. I’m taking the asthmatic kid that I really want to kiss on a jogging trip for our first date.”

“Well, come on! Yes, my shoes are comfortable. What are we doing?”

Bucky just replied in a sing-song voice, “You’ll see!”

\---

One hand tightly clasped in Bucky’s and one hand loosely gripping a stuffed bear in a blue suit, Steve felt a little silly walking along the beach. He looked up at Bucky from the corner of his eye, admiring the way his hair reflected the fading sunlight. He rolled his eyes at his own thoughts. “This, right here, is the cheesiest moment I have and ever will experience in my entire life.”

Bucky laughed, short and loud, and shook his head. “That sounds like a challenge.”

“Oh, come on. You can’t beat this. We went to Coney Island for our first date. You insisted on winning me this stupid bear, and then went ahead and named it after yourself. And now we’re walking hand in hand down the beach, and I’m thinking about how pretty your hair looks reflecting the sunset.”

Bucky grinned down at him, “You like my hair, Stevie?”

“Oh my god, stop.”

“No, no, come on. Tell me how luscious it is and how you want to run your pretty, long fingers through it.”

“It looks greasy, and I never want to touch it.”

“Well, that’s just a lie. My hair is never greasy. Try again.”

Steve just laughed and knocked into him with his shoulder.

“Okay, so per your guidelines, I had to take you on a date before I could kiss you.”

“Indeed.”

“I’ve taken you on a date,” Bucky said, suddenly serious. He stopped walking and turned toward Steve, pulling their joined hands up to his chest.

Steve, feeling stupidly brave and disarmingly nervous, said, “You have.”

Bucky let go of Steve’s hand, letting it fall gently on his chest. He reached up to brush his knuckles along Steve’s cheekbone, “Can I kiss you?”

Steve’s fingers clenched in Bucky’s shirt, and he nodded.

Bucky’s thumb caressed the line of his jaw, with his other fingers feather-light on the hairline behind his ear. Steve rose to his toes, just barely, as Bucky pressed forward, capturing his lips perfectly against his own. It lasted just a few nearly frozen seconds, the only movement being the breeze rustling their clothes and hair. Bucky pulled away first, just enough so they still shared breath, and rested his forehead against Steve’s. Steve’s eyes remained closed, his fingers still wound in Bucky’s shirt. Bucky cradled Steve’s head in his hand.

“How’s that for cheesy?”

Steve, laughing, shoved at Bucky’s chest, but Bucky pulled him right back in. Their lips were parted in smiles as they pressed together, laughing as they breathed each other in. Bucky’s other hand caught Steve’s hip, holding him steadily against him, neither pulling him in nor pushing him away. Steve wanted to reach up for his arm, his waist, his hair, his anything, but he didn’t know what to do with the stupid bear. He whined in his throat and pulled away.

“What? What’s wrong? Did I do something?”

Steve shook his head quickly. “No, no. It’s fine. It’s perfect. I just,” he sighed then continued, “I can’t fully participate with a stuffed animal in my hand.”

Bucky laughed and kissed him one more time before stepping away to put a respectable distance between them. He linked their fingers again and started to walk towards the street. “There will be more time for that later.”

That thought hadn’t really occurred to Steve. He nodded and said softly, “Yeah.” He smiled, more to himself than anything else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i would say i promise to update sooner next time but we all know that's a lie i'll post when i post im sorry for being garbage
> 
> Oh, and from here on out, I'll probably be cutting down on the social media. It's fun, but really hard to come up with ideas. There will be a few here and there, but it's gonna be mainly just story from here on out, I think.
> 
> If anyone's interested, you can find the characters on these social media platforms:  
> Steve - [twitter](http://twitter.com/stevegrgrs/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/stevegrgrs/)  
> Bucky - [twitter](http://twitter.com/jbuckybarns/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/jbuckybarns/)  
> Natasha - [twitter](http://twitter.com/nat_widow7xX/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/nat_widow7/)  
> Clint - [twitter](http://twitter.com/bendy_barton/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/bendybarton/)  
> Peggy - [twitter](http://twitter.com/peggycarter007/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/peggycarter007/)  
> Angie - [twitter](http://twitter.com/broadwayangie/) [instagram](http://instagram.com/broadway_angie/)  
> Sam - [twitter](http://twitter.com/falcon__punch/)  
> Riley - [twitter](http://twitter.com/okrileyok/)
> 
> As always, you can follow me on [tumblr](http://queerbucks.tumblr.com/)!!


	7. Chapter 7

Bucky was very conscious of how fast his heart was beating in his chest. He wondered if Steve could hear it. He glanced at him but didn’t see anything to suggest anything was out of the ordinary. The bear he had spent too long to win was cradled against Steve’s chest. He couldn’t help but grin at the image. He wondered what Steve would do with it in his dorm. If he’d just throw it in a closet and forget about it, or if he’d sleep with it in his bed, cuddling it to his chest and pressing his face into it for comfort.

Images of Steve with sleep-mussed hair flooded his mind, lines from his pillow pressed into his skin, eyes still heavy with sleep but looking at him with such intensity. He shook his head and stared at his shoes as they walked. He knew they were nearing Steve’s dorm and wasn’t looking forward to ending the night. He still couldn’t believe it had happened. They were in the same place, holding hands nearly the whole night, even now. They had kissed. Bucky swore his lips still tingled from it. He had barely thought of anything else the entire way home. He just wanted another opportunity to kiss him again. Maybe he’d get one more chance tonight before letting Steve into the building. God, he hoped so.

He was broken from his thoughts when Steve tugged on his hand. He followed him to the walkway between his dorm building and the one nearest it. Steve leaned against the wall, and Bucky mirrored him. He reached for the bear in Steve’s arms, and he surrendered it easily. He played with the buttons on his suit, feeling Steve’s eyes on him as he did so.

He flicked his eyes up and met Steve’s. A grin broke across his face when he saw his cheeks heat up after being caught staring.

“I don’t think I’m ever gonna get tired of your blush.”

Steve looked away and ran a hand through his hair to push it out of his face. Bucky set the bear on the ground and stepped in closer to Steve. He cupped his hand around Steve’s side, just above his hip. His other hand reached up to finish brushing his hair off his forehead. Steve let out a slow breath and looked at Bucky through his eyelashes.

Suddenly both of Steve’s hands were on his face, pulling him down to his level. Steve’s lips were warm against his. His hands roamed as the kiss continued, sliding down his chest and up his back, gripping his arms, cradling his neck, brushing through his hair. He seemed to be making up for last time, now that his hands were free. Bucky pulled back for a moment to adjust their position, tilting his head to the other side.

Steve’s lips were parting now, drawing Bucky’s bottom lip into his mouth. He didn’t do more than suck on it for a moment, but it drove Bucky crazy. He groaned and pushed in again, harder; Steve’s back pressed into the wall of the building. He held him there with both hands on his hips, his thumbs caressing right at the edge of his waistband.

Steve jumped when his metal thumb brushed against bare skin. He broke away from the kiss and looked down. “Why is your hand so  _ cold _ ?”

Bucky froze in place for a moment.  _ Shit. Shitshitshit.  _ He stepped back and shoved his hands into his pockets. He tried to huff a laugh, but it came out with no humor. Steve looked at him worriedly, arms folded again across his chest. “This,” he started then took a deep breath, “this is the thing I was, um, weird about. My arm.”

Steve stepped forward slowly and gently tugged the arm out of his pocket so he could see it. He sucked in a small breath when the light glinted off it. He pushed his sleeve up, trying to see more of it. “Bucky…”

He closed his eyes and turned away as Steve’s fingers, feather light, traced across his palm. “People get, like, uncomfortable when they see it. Or I try to tell them. And I just, I wanted to be normal. For once. You know? I didn’t want to worry about it.”

Steve reached up to cup Bucky’s cheek and brushed his thumb along his cheekbone. His other hand curled into Bucky’s and held it against his chest. He turned Bucky’s head so they could make eye contact. “You don’t have to worry about me, Buck. You don’t have to tell me anything until you’re ready. I don’t care.” He squeezed his hand. “I mean,” he began to flounder, “I  _ care _ because it’s part of you, but I, like,” he sighed and let his chin fall to his chest. “I don’t know what I’m saying.”

Bucky clenched his fingers around Steve’s to get his attention. Steve looked at him, biting his lip nervously. “Thanks,” was all he said. The tightness around Steve’s eyes loosened.

“Sorry for, um, freaking out? It was  _ cold _ .” Steve blushed again, but he didn’t look away this time, instead pulling Bucky closer. The hand not grasping Bucky’s rested just below his shirt collar, and he leaned onto the balls of his feet to get closer. He whispered, “Can I?” and waited for Bucky’s nod before connecting their lips once again.

They kept it slow this time, just careful brushes of their lips as they got used to the feel of each other. Steve sighed happily when Bucky wrapped an arm around to the small of his back to pull him closer. His fingers curled underneath the collar of the shirt, his knuckles brushing against Bucky’s collar bone. He held on firmly, rising to the tips of his toes for better leverage. Bucky was chuckling into the kiss, and Steve could feel the vibrations from his chest against his fingers. He couldn’t help smiling too, pulling back just for a moment to catch a quick breath.

Bucky leaned back as he leaned in. Steve opened his eyes to see what was wrong, and saw Bucky reaching to take off his glasses. The was a small line in the spot between his eyebrows that his overlarge frames had obviously given him. Bucky slid them off his nose and flipped them around to put them on himself. Steve didn’t try to stop the bubble of laughter escaping his chest.

“How do I look?” Bucky brushed a hand through his hair and lifted his elbow high in a pose.

Steve looked for a moment, squinted, and said, “Blurry.”

Bucky barked out a laugh before taking the glasses off and folding them as he leaned back in for another kiss. He slid them into Steve’s back pocket, leaving his thumb tucked into the fabric. He kissed a bit more fiercely now that there was nothing between them anymore. His lips dragged away, down to his jaw, then followed a random path to his neck. Steve muttered, “God,” and, “fuck,” every few moments. His arms were now clenching and unclenching in Bucky’s shirt at his back. Bucky grinned at each noise and removed his lips from the skin to let his breath ghost over the now damp skin.

He traveled back up to Steve’s lips and, after pressing a few chaste kisses there, whispered, “Stevie.” Steve’s eyes fluttered open to look at him. He looked like a debouched mess, lips red and long eyelashes making the heaviness of his eyelids that much more pronounced.

He let his arms fall from Bucky’s back and glared playfully at him. “I can’t believe you’re using that against me right now.”

Bucky laughed and shook his head. “No, no, not against you. I actually thought it might work to my advantage a little.” Steve rolled his eyes and stepped back from him a little bit.

“It’s getting late.”

Bucky’s hands stayed on Steve’s hips, not letting him get too far away. “And?”

“I have class tomorrow.”

Bucky grinned. “And?” he repeated.

Steve laughed and pulled out of his arms, reaching down for the bear. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow. We can make plans.”

Bucky pouted but let Steve get a few paces away. “I’ll hold you to that.”

“I’m not the one that didn’t show up last time.”

“Hey!” Steve laughed as Bucky chased after him for one final kiss. He pulled the glasses out of Steve’s pocket to place them back on his nose carefully. Steve blinked a few times to readjust. “Tomorrow.”

“Yeah, tomorrow.” He smiled before turning and walking into his building.

\---

**it was nice meeting u today :-)**

_ oh my god _

**im rly looking forward to our future encounters :-)**

_ go away _

**ur lips are really soft**

**and ur like. so pretty.**

**what the fuck stevie**

**and ur cheekbones!!!!! what highlight do u use**

_ I’m trying to sleep!!!! _

**yeah i know**

**im just gettin u prepared for ur dreams (;**

_ GOODBYE _

**u like it**

_ shut up _

**never**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry this is the end :((((( it's like. nothing. but they kiss a lot so that's good. i rly wish i could continue this story but i have like. nothing left in me. im sorry but thank u so much for sticking through this journey with me it's been so fun and i appreciate each and every person for reading this. y'all are so sweet and wonderful and i wish i could make u all a pie.
> 
> thank you!!!! <3


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